Showing posts from June, 2013

Living One Day At A Time

The thought of living one day at a time, is not a new one. It is done by not worrying about the next day as you can not predict if you will even be around this earth the next day. In reality we would guess that we will live to the next day. How are we suppose to plan for tomorrow then. I beleive you should plan ior have a plan of action for the following days and try to stick with it. Have realistic goals in mind. To say your not going to drink today is fine, about the next day , maybe your not sure? If you have a few months or days sober, it is possible this thought hits your head.

The best thing to do one hour at a time is pray for strength to not drink because of problems or issues you may have. Drinking just makes them go away for a while, and continued drinking will cause problems with issues that could of been taken care of the first day. I was guilty of this and would put off important things and let them build up until I was in trouble with finances of whatever.

 It is Sunday a…

Back in the Saddle Again, Sober

I had to get away from AA for a few days and refresh myself from the war stories. I am feeling better that I took a break and ready to go to a 10am Meeting this morning. I think making a few meetings in a week is going to be where I will not burn out so much. We will see, it really is noce to go to meetings and see some good folks and say hi to them.

I made some decisions that are based on how I feel about going to meetings everyday and to my 4 year chip that I could care less. It really means nothing to me, maybe when I reach 5 years increments, that will be a celebration of sorts. What matters is staying sober and living life to the best I can. I write a lot and this gets my feelings out, and I suggest for you to do this. It is good for your soul and read about positive affirmations and meditate. Meditation is good, and these are a lot of you tube videos for self-hypnosis that really can calm down a mind that races .

You still have to enjoy every day and if something bothers you chang…

Burning out in AA

I have to speak for myself, I think I am getting burned out at AA. I have been going to at least one meeting a day and I have to say this. AA does not keep me sober!! Shocked, don't be , I realized last night that my spiritual relationship with God is what keeps me sober. It has kept me sober for over 4 years, not AA. I am not downplaying AA , I am stating a fact. Where did I get this spiritual relationship? From prayer in the morning and all during the day and at night. The craving for beer or pot has gone, and has been for a long time. In AA each person recounts their drinking and what they drank , it makes me thirsty for a drink. No shit, it is crazy to me, that war stories are told and I am sick of them. Let's talk about living today and not" Hi I am Tom and I am glad to be at AA and I have been sober for 60 years and by the grace of this program I have been sober for this long, and the guy begins to recite every chapter in the Big Book". So fucking what, is he n…

William James and Sobriety

William James was a was an American philosopher and psychologistwho had trained as a physician. He lived in the late 1800s to 1910. He also was the first person to start a Psychology class in America. He is mentioned in Bill W.'s video I saw on an AA site on the Internet. Bill W. said after reading "The Varieties of Religious Experiences" by William James he had a spiritual awakening. He had no desire after this episode to take another drink.

Interested as I am about this subject, Alcoholism, I decided to buy this book and wow, it is over my head. William is a Philosopher that blows me away with his words in this book. It is over 400 pages on religious beliefs and material concerning religion as a whole and spiritual beliefs that manifest itself. It is hard reading to a guy like myself.

After doing some research and putting down this book. I find out how brilliant this man is, or was and how he added to oour society of AA and the world at large. These are a few quotes f…

Sober Past Time Projects

I like to fool around with music and videos, this is an example of what I like to do in my spare time, I hope you enjoy this I composed the music and the Video was shot of the West Texas Skyline from several photographs.  Christopher

Selective Reasoning with a Sober Human


How Long Should You Take To Work The 12 Steps

The twelve steps of Alcoholics Anonymous are meant to help you stay sober. The faster you work these twelve steps the chances of having a relapse dwindles.Yes, work these within a month if possible , then start working with other alcoholics to help them get sober, this is a plan of action. A plan that needs no hesitation. You will find those of us t
hat say you should work step 4 for a few months, that's crap. You can work this step in a few days if not in a couple of days. AA has been known in the past for making newcomers go through hell in these simple steps. No more, as Chris Raymer suggest , take these steps and work them with a sponsor as quickly as possible. You will need to do this in order to not have a relapse of alcoholism.

I'm guilty of not doing this, as of today I am going into warp speed and working through my fourth step and onward, I will meet with my sponsor as soon as possible and go  over my 4th and 5th step. I have heard this over and over again and I need …

Sunday The Day of Rest

Take it easy today, is the slogan of this Sunday 06/21/2013. Sometimes our dreams are not God's dream for us, yet how do we know? I have a dream of shooting surfing on North Padre Island Texas and I have lived this dream, but not on my time. God decides when your dreams are to happen and how to prepare for these dreams, give your heart and soul and prayer to God and let him make that decision. Is this an easy task, of course not. It is something we have to do everytday, is ask for his forgiveness in our own selfish ways. Then pray for the things in your life to change. They will in time. The spiritual malady that exists in each and every one of us, is to have what we want now.

It is too unrealistic to get what we want on our own time, Thy will be done , not ours. It's hard to swallow that line, yet when we do all sorts of wonderful things in our lives start to happen. When I surrender myself to God to do with me as he sees fit, I get an answer but maybe not the answer to a ques…

Friday 06/21/2013 Big Book Series

The "Big Book" of AA says this,"half measures availed us nothing.We stood at the turning point.We asked his protection and care with complete abandon." What does this mean to you? 

Chris Raymer in New York City Speaks in this video, He is from Ingram , Texas and is excellent!! I think it means that we tried to do things half ass and they were not good enough. We still fell on our own habits and forgot about God and now is the time to fully understand him and how he works. Here are the steps to recovery is the next sentence.

SO we tried and we fell, unless we changed our attitudes, we are destined for more misery. I don't want that in my life, do you? So we took on the twelve steps of recovery and tried to work these into our daily lives. This is all try to work these steps to the best we could is all God ask from us. Say your morning prayers and ask for God to lift you up and prepare you for the day ahead.

This is a program for living life sober and just wanting a…

The Spiritual Malady Inside Alcoholics

The days go by so fast that we have to slow ourselves down. As an alcoholic that is in recovery, I know too much about the ins and outs of a normal day. What is normal? No one can define this except to live life on a daily basis, and abide by all laws. The laws of society and your place in this world must be ideal for one to live. The spiritual malady exists in each and every person on this earth. When one has an addiction, the spiritual malady can go insane inside of a person whom is alcoholic. I will explain this further in this book. We, as a society shun alcoholics that are on the street pushing baskets from one place to another. They are searching for their soul and drinking for these few unfortunates is a way of living. The spiritual malady inside these people is the same as most recovering alcoholics. The difference is controlling this through a spiritual connection to a higher power, or God. This sounds very easy to the normal drinker who m can put down one drink and be finish…

Working The Steps on Thurday

Working the twelve steps in AA can help with a multitude of addictions you may have. It could be alcoholic, eating disorders, gambling, and anything you have an addiction to. These steps have been successful in daily living for millions of people. Why do they work? The only answer I can come up with is that you let go and help others to obtain their destination, whether alcoholic, or a person with an addiction to eating too much or eating too little. You let God take over and let him rule your spirit. It sounds complicated, but if it were easy we would have more sober and less problems in life.

You must work with other alcoholics or you die. That's the truth, Alcohol will kill you eventually if you keep getting sober then slip often enough, this is a proven fact. The twelve steps of alcoholics anonymous was written with you in mind. To help you with daily living without a drink. It works if you work it. Take it easy on your self and make the best of it you can.

Did you know AA is on…

Wed and a New Beginning

This is a great day to start a new project. What can you do? Well , I will let you in on what I am doing. I write articles for several different magazines online. I am pretty sloppy on this blog site, yet when it comes to work I am as precise on my grammar as I can be. Spelling has to be exact, and word usage has to be perfect. We strive for perfection anyway, right. Well none of us are perfect , and I get rejected almost 50 percent of the time with my articles. If your starting out, I would suggest you study up on grammar and make an outline on the topic you will write about.

When I write for this blog I do it my way, its a free for all for me. So my sentence structure and words just come from my brain onto this page without any order. Therefor the misconception of a good writer is at hand. I suggest also that you write for the best. Yahoo Voices is a great place to make good money, yet the Editors are strict. If you get an article on this site , you can make big money. I have made ab…

Tuesday and Living It

Well my fellow friends, its Tuesday again and what a day. Went to AA at noon and I was smoked out. I smell like a big lit cigarette. The meeting was good, yet I won't be going back due to all the smoke in this place. I was told, hey man you must of been to a bar that was filled with smoke, so why does it matter.  Well it does, I have quit for four years and I hate the smell of it on me. I can handle some smoke, but shit I smell. I will change and take a shower soon. You see we just can't have things our way. I have been working for a company that paid me by the job. Well I was paid peanuts for the work I do. I had enough and quit that today. I will find something else. I am experienced in many facets so not that worried about it.

So as, you can tell, I have had a trying day and God the spirit that guides me, knows what all I have done today. I believe he is ok with my decisions. The work was getting to me, not being paid what I deserved. I thought I could hold on and get more c…

Monday and Sober Today

I have been writing my journal on this blog and a few of you have been reading it, so I will continue my journey into this AA world. It is ok to just jump right up and leave a meeting. I did it again last night. No reason to be rude when you do this, I was interrupted by the host and got up set the book on the desk in front of this man, looked him in the eyes, and shook my head. I then left. It is ok, do I have resentments, evidently so. I do not like to be interrupted in a rude way when I am at a meeting stating my ten cents worth of knowledge. Dammit!!

But I am cooled down and was last night, I plan to go back tonight to the same group, just because there is a guy who possibly had a bad night, or didn't get to see his kids on Sunday might have made him this way. I forgive him, and move onward toward reality. AA is not perfect, but when it comes to managing your life, you can't get much better than AA. There are some really good folks in AA and then there are the ones who lin…

Sunday Bloody Sunday and Fathers Day Sober

Well, just got back from my refreshing trip to the Hill Country in Texas. I did not do all I set out to do, but I did get to say Happy birthday to Harry,. He is my friend of many years that turned 90 today, and he was doing just fine, a little dementia but ok. I had a great photographic experience as you see in these photos. It rained most of Saturday then I headed home this morning so I could get ready for Monday.

I did not pick up my four year chip from La Hacienda, and I have my reasons, I shall pick it up here in my home town where I know some people. It really matters not where I get it, just need to recieve it I guess. I went to 2211 AA club in Kerrville last night and it was good. That's the thing about AA you can go to other towns and be welcome there. Its like you have friends all over the world. It is a great thing. Had a good steak dinner and went to bed last night and woke up , said my pryers and went to see Harry before I left for Midland, Texas.

Not much to talk abo…
Friday night , the beginning to a weekend and before you know it , a past tense. Monday will be here. We just go round and round for some odd reason. Have you ever thought of this? One day just leads into another day and for what? I don't know what God's meaning on earth is for us, and neither do you. Some of us have girlfriends,and maybe that is why we have weekends, to spend with our wives and girlfriends. I don't have either one, and I am still interested in what life has to bring me, or what is it I can offer life!

Maybe that is what daily living is about, as an alcoholic, I lived for the weekends, and staying up all night smoking a joint and having a few beers. Watching TV and "Fast Times At Ridgemont High", That was a typical Friday night activity, of course we watched other things I just don't remember what? When sober , and sobriety kick in we are to go to AA meetings at 8pm every night possible. I find this interesting , and do I like it?…

Beautiful Day In Wonderland, Sober Again

Its a sunny, and hot morning in West Texas, I had a great evening with a young lady that is just superb. I met her at AA and she is quite the spiritual one. I need this in my life, we closed down the Outback Steakhouse last night, and she was a colorful person. Very pretty and soft spoken, but funny. She will radiate in my mind today. However I have a tough day ahead of me like I guessed I would.

I will let God into my system and let him work miracles in me today. I need him every hour to be with me. I rely upon God to help you and me. He does miracles , when I can't do my work right. I fix computers and I have a All in One to fix and totally break down and rebuild this morning and another PC after that one. Can I do them all, we will see.  I am going to Fed ex to pick up parts and then off to my first account this am.

I have a great weekend to look forward to , I get my four year chip from the treatment center, La Hacienda on Sunday in  Ingram , Texas. God's country and I get t…

Mid Noon On Wed 06/12/2013

Work has slowed for me today and I am piling up for Thursday to get some work accomplished in IT. I have had a good day , ecept that I met a girl in AA and she didn't call me yet. I was a bit bummed out cause she is really special to me. She is beautiful , smart, and funny. All wrapped up into one cool package. She is even my age. Go figure and she has not called me back from this morning. I know that there are people in AA that do not call, or feel like shit and just don't want to be bothered. I , on the other hand am consistent and if I say I will be there I am. She made me no promises, though, so I should shut up.

In AA relationships can be gruesome, and overwhelming. Two people that meet in AA may not be that compatable with each other. You seee them every night at meetings and they know your inner most secrets as you speak in AA at closed and open meetings. You get to know their weakness and their strengths. For a relationship to work in AA , one must be careful not to ste…

Wed "The Age Of Anxiety" Sober Again

Historians will probably call our time on earth" the age of anxiety"anxieties are caused by the natural result when our hopes are centered in anything short of God. When we make anything alse our goal, frustration, and defeat are inevitable.Though we have less to worry about than previous generations, we have more worry.We have it easier than our forefathers, we have more uneasiness. We should have less real cause for anxiety, as we believe more in God and practice our spiritual beliefs. It is not easy to do. Try to pray for God to lift your anxieties, some grow into full panic attcks. If this happens go see a doctor and possibly seek medication for this. One must take medication for heart problems and if you have diabetes you have to take medicine. Panic is no different when it controls your life.

There is many problems that God can control, but if there is a chemical imbalance to a person , they need medicine. Do not be afraid to accept this help and be aware of the problem…

Tuesday Afternoon and Sober

I dreaded and shook when I went to work this morning, it was a casual mistake I did to this computer, and all was fine. I asked for God's help and did it happen. Yes, and not when I wanted it to either. That is how the spiritual God works in my world,. If you look back at what I wrote this morning you will tell that I am in a wreck of emotions. I did not let it get to me , though. I kept my head on straight and went to get the part I needed and had a few problems and noticed this PC was not attached by brackets in the right manner, solved my ordeal.

It is the little things like what I went through that can cause a person to think stupid thoughts. I did not think about drinking, but if I had only a few days sobriety , I would of thought about it. This shows how crazy your inner self reacts to things you have no control over. The spiritual malady was being tugged at within my soul and I knew if I just prayed about it all would come out alright.

This is what AA is all about is believi…

Tuesday, What A Day

Tuesday and what a day this will be for me. I have an easy day but this morning I have a hard project. I will not discuss it. I might as well. There is a bezel that goes on a LCD screen on a laptop and I could not get this on yesterday so I ordered a new one and it comes in this morning. I hope this will fit and I can complete my job. I get nervous thinking about this because it it so easy to install. Yet for some reason I could not . It has me baffled, and I need to give this to God to give me answers, because I feel like a fool. I might have wires behind it binding this up. I will just have to bite the bullet and find out. Please God let this part go on and let me feel conscious that I am doing the best job I can. Let me not be nervous and take it easy on myself. I am a nervous wreck in thinking of this project this morning, the customer is ok with it. I will need to be calm , cool and collective. I can get this piece on this morning with no problem, it might take a little more effo…

Monday Morning and Sober

Monday morning and being sober today. It is sunny and bright in West Texas this morning , that only means hot heat and hot heads. Well, if I let the hot heads get to me, as I thought , the work load is light for me today.. I never know until I reach for my keynoard and punch in. Technology today makes it possible for me to get my work assignments over the PC and then do the work. I can shose not to do it. However it will just stack up on me through the weeek and I would hate that.

I like my job, I work in IT break fix, and fix computers and printers for a company out of Dallas. I don't make that much money yet, as I have not gotten all my Certifications for working on all the different computers out. I am taking it slowly to try to understand the platforms I am working on.

Have a great day and know God will help you when you ask for his help, even at work pray a little prayer like( Thy will be done, not mine) and it works. You will see that you will complete task that use to baffle …

Sobriety and Monday 06/10/2013

Well Monday is coming and a new week is ahead for us all. Hopefully you had a good weekend and your ready for the real world again on Monday. I went to AA step study on Sunday night, and it was good as usual. Step 4 is what we discussed. I have not done this the AA way, I have done it my way, and do it everyday. To do it right though , Is coming soon. I have a sponsor and I will start working on step 4 like most do.

I am not going to run AA like I want to. Selfish and self centerd , is what you could call this. I am going to run this program the AA way. I hold no resentments toward anyone I can think of. Well, hold on there are some customers I do have resentments about, so maybe I have to dig a little to find out what my issues are. I guess that is the true meaning of working the 4th step.

However , Monday is a new day and my workload will be light , possibly. It usually is, and I am grateful for this. I need the extra money , but I am still in training and I like to take it slow and c…