Showing posts with label help others. Show all posts
Showing posts with label help others. Show all posts

Sunday, July 16, 2017

Negativity and Living Life Sober

That thing is this:
 
Not all things that people may say or think are really about you.
 
If someone is pretty much always negative about what other people do or
someone sometimes make personal attacks and let the destructive words flow
then - when such things are aimed at you - remember that it isn't always about
you.
 
Such words or negative habits can be a way for that person to release pent up
anger, frustration or jealousy about something in his or her own life. 
 
Or a way to reinforce that his or her viewpoint or belief is the right one. 
 
Or he or she may have a habit of getting others involved emotionally - baiting
them - to build a negative spiral, an argument or fight to get attention. 
 
It's about him or her. Not about something you did or want to do. 
 
You may just have been in the wrong place at the wrong time.
 
I have found that it can have a calming effect to remember this. And to remember
that the other person is still human and might be having a bad day, month,
marriage or job.
 
This doesn't mean that all criticism you may get is about the other person. Think
about what people tell you and ask yourself if there is something in what they say
that you can take to heart and perhaps work on.
 
Just don't make the mistake of thinking that all criticism or verbal attacks you get
is always about you. That will only tear you and your days apart and create
misery in your life. Taken from a positive email I got today. Chris
 

Sunday, July 9, 2017

The Sinclair Method VS Alcoholics Anonymous

I was searching for a topic today and I found the Sinclair method of approach to drinking too much alcohol. I think it is a good approach to the alternative of AA. You decide what you think. Here is a few words about what The Sinclair Method is:

The Sinclair Method (TSM) uses the nervous system’s own mechanism, called “extinction”, for gradually removing the interest in alcohol and the behaviors involved in alcohol drinking. Therefore, the technical term for TSM is “pharmacological extinction.”

The key scientific discovery underlying the treatment was that, contrary to earlier beliefs, detoxification and alcohol deprivation do not stop alcohol craving but in fact increase subsequent alcohol drinking[1],[2]. The old idea that alcoholism is caused by physiological dependence on alcohol, therefore, needed to be discarded, and a new understanding of alcoholism developed.

Subsequent research showed that alcohol drinking is a learned behavior [3]. Some individuals, partly for genetic reasons, get so much reinforcement each time they drink, and have so many opportunities to drink and get reinforcement, that the behavior becomes too strong. They cannot always control their drinking; they cannot “just say ‘no’.”  And society calls them alcoholics.
Laboratory studies indicated that in most cases, the reinforcement from alcohol involved the opioid system, i.e., the same system where morphine, heroin, and endorphin produce their effects.[4]

The brain has two primary mechanisms for changing its own wiring on the basis of experience.  First, there is learning for strengthening behaviors that provide reinforcement.  Second, there is extinction for removing behaviors that no longer produce reinforcement.  The best known example involves Pavlov’s dogs that learned to salivate to the sound of a bell when the bell was followed by food, but then had the learned behavior extinguished when the food reinforcement was no longer given after the bell was rung.

Certain medicines, such as naltrexone, naloxone and nalmefene, block the effects of endorphin and other opiates. I reasoned that if alcohol is drunk while one of these opioid antagonists is blocking endorphin reinforcement in the brain, the extinction mechanism would be activated, and it would then produce a small but permanent decrement in alcohol drinking and craving. The next day, the person would be slightly less interested in alcohol. Eventually control would be regained, and the person would no longer be an alcoholic; indeed, they no longer would be interested in alcohol[5].
The Sinclair Method was confirmed, first in a large body of laboratory studies[6], then in over 90 clinical trials around the world[7],[8],[9], and most recently in personal reports by people using it[10]. It has been found to be successful in about 80% of alcoholics.  This is very high for alcoholism treatment, but the treatment is not for everyone: some people apparently have a different form of alcoholism that does not involve the opioid system and cannot be treated effectively with opioid antagonists.

The Sinclair Method is simply taking an opioid antagonist before drinking. Naltrexone, naloxone, and nalmefene are not substitution drugs similar to methadone for heroin addiction or Nicorettes™ for nicotine addiction. The opioid antagonists are not addictive, and they do not directly reduce craving for alcohol.  And unlike disulfiram, the opioid antagonists do not produce an unpleasant aversive effect. Indeed, the opioid antagonists do not do anything until after endorphin has been released. Then the mechanism of extinction is triggered, and the extinction mechanism in turn progressively but permanently removes the neural cause for excessive drinking.John David Sinclair, Ph.D., Researcher Emeritus

Interesting study , as I have taken Naltraxone from my psychiatrist and I have to admit my craving for alcohol did not exist. I think it is good to look at alternative treatments. Please comment. Thank You Chris

Friday, May 19, 2017

Social Anxiety and staying Sober

I found this article in my email and I found it o be true about anxiety and people's perception and reality about anxiety. I hope you enjoy this article. Chris

The Three Steps to Dealing with Social Anxiety

At this point we established that trying to avoid or get rid of the feeling of social anxiety usually backfires. It leads to more social anxiety in the long run and you end up restricting your life and ridding it of all meaning and fun.
So here are three steps (backed up by decades of studies) that actually work:

STEP 1: ACCEPT YOUR ANXIETY

Social anxiety is not the enemy. It’s a feeling. A primal “warning” signal from your body to keep you from danger. Problem is, it was designed to keep you safe from wild animals and falling rocks, not strangers and pretty girls.
So when you notice anxiety coming up, together with all the negative thoughts, feelings, and sensations, sit with it. Don’t push it away, or change it in any way. Instead, let it be there, and really experience what it’s like to feel the fear.
Observe it like a curious scientist, without putting any judgment on it. You don’t have to like the fear, but you can learn to accept and embrace it as it is.
Notice where in your body you can feel it the most. What happens when you take a deep breath? When you hold eye contact with a stranger, does the fear get stronger? Stand up straight and lift your head up. What happens then?
Don’t try to change what you feel. Simply notice what happens. Instead of pushing the anxiety away, observe what’s going on. This trains your mind that anxiety in social situations is not something that needs to be avoided.

STEP 2: DO WHAT YOU DEEPLY CARE ABOUT

We usually feel the most vulnerable and the most anxious in the areas we value most in life.
I’ve never met a socially anxious person who didn’t care about having friends or connecting with people.
Instead of fighting anxiety, let anxiety be your guide towards what you care about most. There’s a good chance that situations where you get the most nervous, are the ones that matter most to you.
Being aware of this makes it easier to face your fears. One question we often ask our coaching clients is:
What are the things that are so important to you that you’re willing to feel anxious or nervous to experience them?
Think about it like this. When you are on your deathbed, do you want to look back on a life where you haven’t felt any anxiety, you never felt awkward, and you were always comfortable — but you also never really went all in, you missed out on parties, and never talked to the attractive stranger on your way home?
The other option is to look back on a life where you often felt nervous, anxious, and insecure — but it was a life filled with adventures, parties, random encounters with strangers, and deep connections.
So take a minute and really reflect on this:
What is so important to experience that you’re willing to feel a little anxious?

STEP 3: CONFRONT YOUR FEAR

This is the hardest part, but it’s also the most important one.
It might mean walking up to a pretty girl. It might mean talking to people you don’t know at a party. Or it might mean smiling at the cashier, asking your boss for a raise, or speaking up at a meeting.
There’s no easy way around it, and there are definitively no shortcuts. Be willing to feel the fear and do what matters most to you.
However, know that you don’t have to start with the scariest scenario. You can create a fear hierarchy, jotting down what scares you, and then start tackling the least scary item (e.g., saying “Hi” to a stranger) and working your way up to scarier tasks (e.g., asking a girl for her number).
The more often you face your fears, the better you’ll get at it.


Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Sober and What Becomes when We stay Sober

I have a lot on my plate lately, but it has been good and different. Lost my step father, however , I know he is with God. I am
not sad, just motivated to start my life on a new turn.I have been lookig for another job, as the one I have is not what I like to do. I have prayed about this daily and my prayers are coming true. I have had a few consultants call me on jobs that I like to do. Times in Midland are booming again with the oil field picking up and that brings in more business and retail shops, plus high prices.I will take advantage of the time I have and focus on the reality of being sober and alive. At times , I feel really lonely but then I get a glimpse of how lucky and fortunate I have in my life. I am thankful that I am not in a wheel chair , I am thankful I have some money, and food, plus a house that has musical instruments for me to pass the time, and hopefully get better.I have more than I deserve in material things, and yes most of it has been put o credit cards, so work has to continue.I like work and meeting new people, and I like doing certain types of work. Now I have a choice and that makes life a bit easier. However I am sober,and if not for AA and my program I could not feel this way. When a person gets off the beer or whatever, they have plenty of free time, at first . Then after a few years you realize this free time is just not there for drinking. I look back and made my free time available for smoking pot and drinking beer. I did not get much out of it except for misery in the end.

 This misery has stopped eight years ago, however it does get replaced by something called isolation time. This isolation time is not too good either, a little bit is ok. To rest and pray and relax is all good and healthy, but not all day long...lol...I think my age of 54 is starting to slip it's ugly head in, as I know what I want but at times what I want is not what others want . I do miss having a girl to love, I have met one recently in AA and she was a sweetheart , so I thought, then she shut me down like I did not exist, so beware of other alcoholics that you might like to date. We are still sick in a fashion, just not sick from doing the wrong things. God Bless Chris Hit THE FOLLOW BUTTON FOR MORE

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Everything happens, When nothing seems Possible Sober

Well, I have had a great weekend. I started off with getting hired for a job that requires a lot of traveling and this is fine. Followed by a girlfriend of mine who came back into my life and wanted to go out Friday night. When things look bleak in sobriety, beware because something big is probably about to happen for the good. I have been a little depressed over the last few weeks , and I still kept my head up high knowing that something good would become from all the resumes I have put out and staying busy with my program and AA. It never fails as God comes into my life daily even though I feel he has left me, and brings me big surprises. That is how sobreity works, not expecting anything really and when your down keep busy helping others and it will come back to help you. That is how eight years of living has been for me. I forget at times this rule of thumb. God never forgets me however, he just keeps me outside of myself and I get loaded up with ideas of what I can do to make life better for myself and my friends.

Don't give in or give up when you are sober and this is an easy thing to do when alll in life is not where you want to be at. In time God will listen and change your direction and guide you in a way that might not be your way but his way of getting you out of situations that use to baffle us. We use to drink when we could not find an answer or drink because we found an answer. However drinking did us no long term good, in the short term drinking let us forget the past, and future of our problems. Then you wake up and wonder why you feel like shit and the same roller coaster ride begins again and again. I can honestly say I don't miss that about drinking. Hope you have a good day. Chri

Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Good Things About being Sober

Monday I went to San Antonio with my AA sponsor to a meeting in which my sponsor Eddie was to speech
. We had a good time talking on the trip down there and then we hit the meeting in town and he got a standing ovation. Very proud of him and he was proud that I went with him on the 5 hour trip. On the way back on Tuesday to Midland I was called for a second interview with a company I have been trying to get on with in employment. I returned home and this was a phone interview and I had passed my electronics test and personality test , so I was pretty happy. This is a miracle from god that we talk about in AA , and how God works in our lives when we least expect it. Anyway I was invited to my last interview to be held on Thursday morning over the phone again with the hiring manager, so I would assume I am pretty well hired, but I won't know until Thursday.

Sobriety and giving back was was freely given to me is what this AA program is all about. Working the steps and getting out of self is a major part of staying sober as well. Taking your medication as directed is part of the program. Put all these together and you will have a healthy lifestyle working for one day at a time. I am living proof of the miracles and the confusion I bring to the table of a recovering alcoholic. I have fought the system and things in my life just did not work out, even when I thought I was in the right. God has blessed me , even in the hard times of my life as written in this blog with a better life when I let go and do something for others than myself. God Bless and have a good day. Chris

Sunday, April 2, 2017

Moving on with a Sober Life

Well, I have hit a few hurdles in my last few post on this blog. I am back on my medication, as it works and I can function. Be careful what others say to you and about your life. You are the only one living in your own body and you know what works and what does not. Alcohol does not seem to work in any one soul out there that can drink to oblivion. Treatment is a must for the first time alcoholic who suffers and it is usually a good thing for those who are not familiar with the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. If you drink and you are out of control, please seek help, and try to stick with meetings and work the 12 steps of AA as fast as you can in recovery. This will get you feeling better in the long run and will get you familiar with the steps in your life and how they will change your life. By the grace of God , I am still sober even after putting myself through hell, on getting off the medication I am taking, but I am taking it as prescribed and feel like it must be the correct medication as I feel normal now. We all have some emotional or depression in our lives when we sober up. There is a reason why we drank, and although drinking is a disease there are underlying reasons why we drank. Talk to a Doctor and find out these reasons or maybe working the 12 steps you will find a little part of yourself that you can work on to make you happier and not so gloom.

Panic runs deep into my family, my father has it and he still drinks and my son has it and he takes medication as I do for to control the panic. It is a mental disorder that I have and my son has, and it must run in the genes. I cannot control this as I have tried ever since I was a 16 year old boy. I drank alcohol because of my panic attacks, as it was a sedative and kept me calm. I was not a rowdy drunk but I drank on a daily basis so I could get out of my house and try to be normal. I had to come to terms with my Panic Disorder and realize that I needed outside help from a Doctor and I sought this help. Many people in AA frown upon what I am doing but let them frown as I need to socialize and be as normal as most people out there in the world and function . If you have panic disorder, please send me a note and tell me about it. I would appreciate this very much. Thank You Chris Hyer 4/2/2017

Thursday, January 26, 2017

Positive Affirmations with sober Living and Life

Living a positive outlook on life can be a challenge for myself. There is so much negativity around me and in the world. Staying positive in a daily living situation as most alcoholics have to live from day to day is not easy. Waking up , is when I start to look into the mirror
and be blessed that I am not crippled and I am semi-good looking and that I smell clean is a positive role for me on most mornings. I read the bible for positive information to help with my day. I don't do this everyday, and beware of people wanting you to get negative with them. They are in AA and everywhere that you might work, ready to bring you down, not on purpose but so they may feel good about themselves.

If your sober you have taken steps to make sure you can get by the day without a drink. That is very positive in sober living. Therefor , pat yourself on the back that you have made it to this point. There are so many that can not get past this point in thier lives and end up you know where.

Today is a sun shiny day with squirrels running the fence and my puppy chasing the varmets from one end of a tree to the other end of the fence. They are playing and enjoying life as God had intended for us to be. Happy , joyous , and free. We only have today for 24 hours, do a kind deed for another, buy them lunch or a stranger lunch, and see what happens. It is a miracle how this person will react and it shows Gods faith in God above. God watches every move we make, in fact he knows what we will do next. God knows what is going to happen in the next 24 hours ahead so don't over think this as I have, it will add confusion. You only can live one day at a time. Live today as it was your last and think if it was your last day how you would want to behave.God is working a miracle with me , and sometimes I refuse to see it. Please don't be as stubborn as I am .. Chris Hyer

Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Family and Sobriety

My brother who lives in California came for a visit to see my parents and myself over the last few days. He was proud of how my life seemed to be going. He and I were drinking buddies and pot smoking friends as well as brothers. He is older and wiser than I was growing up. He knew when to quit and his little brother just kept drinking and smoking all day long. He is a Doctor and I am a struggling job chaser. If I could change one thing it would be that I would of finished up college, then I might not be chasing jobs on a yearly basis. I am never satisfied I figure. He has been to Paris and Austin and now California with the same corporation for over 30 years. I envy people like this now, and never thought about what I did, doing alcohol and stuff would creep up on myself and put me years behind everyone I loved, but there are possibilities that one day I will be proud of what I do for a living and more happy with my living situation and where I live. I am happy with my progress , but this is a disease that I have and I have a few mental issues, and I live the best God will let me live. Therfor I am not 100% dissapoited with my life, but a little bit.

I did like the fact that my brother is proud of my sobriety and he said he would of killed me if I did not sober up. I have to admit I was pretty bad to my parents when drinking and bad to him, stealing his money for drugs and drinking and all the hell I put everyone through. However the program of AA has taught me not to live in the past but look forward to the future, and that is how I try to live my life on a daily basis. It has been good my last 8 years of sobriety and I am a little more quite and a Introvert, but that is just me. I can change some of the things and some I cannot , as the story goes with most recovering alcoholics. Maybe a few of you can understand where I am coming from.

Donanld Trump , now President is a good thing for our country we hope. I hope one day we can unite as one party and just get along as Americans not separated by two parties but that might be impossible. A new President who has to live up to what he has said might make a difference to everyone in the world and I hope it helps everyone. Anyway have a good day and put a smile on your face, You are alive! Chris Hyer

Tuesday, October 4, 2016

God Sometimes will Throw a Curve Ball

Good morning world, and it is  a beautiful day on Tuesday 10/4/2016. God throws me a curve ball at times and I don't know why? I do not question God as to why he does what he does for me. However , I get dissapoited at times. This job I have been hired for by a temporary agency, told me yesterday that it was no longer available. After waiting for the Territory manager for two weeks to start the job suddenly was not there for me. I had passed the background checks and the drug test and was offered the job but a start date was all I was suppose to be waiting for, and wham , no job. I was furious , but not surprised. I was calm and collective and just said , well God has something in store for me.
 In the meantime I was offered a interview as a sales rep for a company that I am not too sure sbout , if I am the right fit. However I leave this up to God to decide, so I am dressed for success the morning and ready to interview for this job today.

God has all this power and I have to follow what he throws at me. It could be for me to hone into my interview skills or to get a new job, I am not sure where this will lead me to, but I don't give in or up . I have learned this from AA and that is why I cannot stress the importance of going to these AA meetings if you are a recovering alcoholic, they can be very positive on your direction in life in general. You can use these 12 steps of AA to get somewhere in life and let go and let God work his miracles. His miracles for me are enormous, and unsuspecting at most times, and very glorious.

I have made it a little over eight years and God has held my hand and taken me places I woul not of known , that I was cabable of doing and so the chapter in my life keeps running with the clock and God's words to me are good. Have a blessed Day. Chris Hyer

PS. On a positive note a church I really love in Corpus Christy , Texas has ask me to help with thier online program, My friend Harry would be so happy that I volunteered for this position. I hope that I get this as well. Please go to http://chrchunltd.churchonline.org/ and check out Pastor Bill. Very good man with a plan for living and a plan for everyone.

Sunday, September 25, 2016

Changing Your Sobriety With Changing Yourself

It is Sunday 9/25/2016 and I woke up early as usual and in my mind, I knew that working out at the Gym this morning was going to start my day. I get confused do I want to take a shower and then sweat it out or get sweaty then take a shower. So many things run through my head on something this simple. Yes, I look forward to going to the gym now. I have only been there three days now and I feel really good about what I am doing for my body. I even feel a little bit of tightness in my stomach as if I am gaining  strength. I have not worked out in over 30 years, so this little feat of me going to the gym and working out is a new change in my sobriety and it is a good change. WHen you better yourself , it seems to pay off by making me feel like I have accomplished something that God wants in my life. When my new job starts , I am going to have to figure out how I am going to work in the workouts as I am committed to losing weight, mostly.

I am a big guy anyway and that is cool, but I don't want the belly of a big guy. So I mostly run and ride the cycle in the gym. I burn calories and two weeks ago I started eating right. I cheat on eating , a bit but I have cut back on chocolates and other junk that I know has caused me to gain so much weight. The good thing about change and sobriety is that I am not the only one trying to change. At first I did not want to go to the gym cause I have a phobia about all these buff men working out and her comes fatty, then I just made my mind up and went and realized I was smaller than most in the gym,. I psyche myself out at times and think I am the only one. I am wrong, as the re are several thousands of alcoholics that I am sure are working the program or at least trying to work it. That is what change is , it is trying and not talking yourself out of this change in which sobriety is all about is change for the better. Cod Bless. Chris Hyer

Monday, September 12, 2016

Sobriety Curve Balls In our Social Living

Its is Monday 9/12/2016 and a pretty day in Western Texas, I have almost 9 years of sobriety as of this time of year. I have just let go of one full- time job that has lasted almost a year. Why the curve ball has been thrown ? Well, the job was boring and not very interesting to myself. It Paid the bills but I have another job lined up that will do the same, pay the bills. God works in ways that I do not understand , nor or we suppose to understand why God works his miracles in the way he does with us. I have been wanting to leave this former company for months and when the opportunity came and I found another position in which I am interested , I changed like a normal person would.

Now that is not to say I am normal because to me a normal person is one who can drink normal and still hold a job and so the definition of normality is hard to be defined. I am normal in the fact that I pray to God , go to AA meetings and try to live the way God would want me to live. I am 53 and yes I am still stubborn in my ways. I am single with one child who is 24 and I am very proud to call him my son, and he loves me. These things I know because now, he can tell me and wants to be around me. We are not very close but close enough to understand that when I am sober he really takes a liking to me.A very fine young man that does not cuss, drink or smoke and works as a cashier for a grocery store in Midland, Texas. He has thrown me a curve ball in how he lives his life, very quite he is and loving and clean.That is all I can be thankful for is he does not have tattoos and not doing drugs and alcohol like his Daddy did. I am very blessed.

I am blessed also with a clear conscious mind that I am doing the right and legal things in my life and not having to look back to see if I have done wrong. That is a plus in sobriety is looking forward  and to the future no matter what age you may be. The Lord has my back all the time and he watches out for me , and when i feel I may be doing something wrong I feel it and retract. God either is or he is not, what is he to you. God Bless Chris Hyer 9/12/2016

Sunday, August 21, 2016

The Big Book and Sobriety

I don't make it a habit to read the Big Book of AA. I do read it in the mornings or evenings where I get bored. I usually see myself in some fashion or another in this book. This could be a present or past reflection on whom I have become as a sober individual. When reading the Big Book of AA , I find passages that are out of date. The meaning of some of the words can be quite confusing to me, so I look some of them up in a dictionary, and the word makes perfect sense to the context in which it is written. I find that reading the pages in the back of the book can be enlightening to myself, as when I go to AA meetings these back chapters are ignored.Most of the AA meetings are focused on the 12 steps of the book in the first 100 or so pages. This is good information and if lived with a spiritual connection do work for the alcoholic who is trying to understand what this whole book and program is about.

I also read the Bible on a daily basis and Rick Warren a Pastor out of California has a book called "The Spirit Driven Life", I believe that is the name of it. This book helps me to understand what God wants for me out of my relationship with him. I was hesitant to read a Pastor book , because of the church , but he has made the words make good sense to me in what my program is all about and that is a spiritual journey into God's life and how to please my God .

Years ago I could not care a less what these two books have to say. In sobriety, you need to believe in a spiritual life bigger than yourself  which can help you get over the first step in AA. How you do this can be confusing but in reality it just means you will give up drinking and or using for a power greater than yourself , the obsession will leave once you believe in this attitude. This sometimes will happen fast and other times it will be slow, I think it is how you believe in a power greater than you as to how fast this approach will transform your brain.The disease of alcoholics is really unfounded, it is a mental instability that causes most of us to drink until we pass out or otherwise get to the point in which we are comfortably numb. To stay sober  means that we will neglect alcohol and drugs and move on through the day and be as normal people do such as work and help others help themselves.

Helping others is key to living a spiritual life, but we first must focus on helping yourself get through the pain of so many years of self-abuse. This takes time and to each individual, this time also can be short to long term. You get what you put into your mind from reading and going to AA meetings and the people that you let yourself be around. I am amazed at the sober ones that have a boyfriend or girlfriend that still drinks and they are trying to stay in this sick relationship. Drinking is fine for those who do not abuse it. So I am not talking about the casual drinker , but the alcoholic who has to live with one whom is alcoholic , this must be a hard situation to cope with. I would have to get away from this person , or I could not of stayed sober for very long.

Well, it is Sunday 8/21/2016 amd I am still employed and paying bills, I go to the grocery store and run errands and do my paper work for work. I am a functioning recovered alcoholic. In the past I put off these things or they would not get done any of them. I seee my progression through these pages in my blog. I also see it and hear it from people in my AA program that say I have come a long way. That is pleasing but in reality I have a little more than 8 years of sobriety with about 20-30 years of drinking, and I am very glad that I do not crave anything like alcohol to make it through the day. I get bored and that just means I need to get busy. I call this idle hands syndrome. You have to be careful and not isolate yourself from the world and I know this at it's best. Have a great day and to feel God is to get knowledge about the spirit of God and I challenge you and myself to know more each day of our creator , so you can live one day at a time and live a whole new outlook on life. God Bles Christopher Hyer

Saturday, August 20, 2016

Saturday and Staying Sober

Saturday in the years of my drinking were days to re0couperate from Friday night highs and drinking. I would not wake up until noon or later and then go get food as I was hungry in which woke me up. It would be close to three or four in the afternoon before my head kicked in and I was truly awake. I am not sure how your Saturday was but for me it was quite and sleepy most of the day. Of course, I was preparing for Saturday night and what I was going to drink or smoke. If I was out of weed, I started to make phone calls to get some for the rest of the week. It was like a totally different lifestyle than it is now.
Eight years later in my present tense, I wake up about six AM and try to sleep in till 7 AM and then I let my puppy out the backdoor and let her do her stuff and fix breakfast and drink juice. That is my usual Saturday now. After breakfast, I look at my work phone to see if I have calls for the day I need to take care of , and then get ready to work them or if I don't I get ready for AA as I have a meeting at 10 AM I like to go to in Midland, Texas. I sometimes go grocery shopping in the morning but that habit has changed, and sometimes I just go and buy a few things cause I really just but what I can eat for a few days , but I buy a lot of sparling water. I like Swepps Sparkling water it is my beer for the day , and I like the fizz and taste of this drink. I have progressed to Gatorade also , for some odd reason, I like the taste.

So you now see the change of when I was using alcohol and drugs and to the now when I do not use these things. I really did not know the difference until I started writing this down on this blog. Maybe it is good to have a blog and write how your past was and what you are like now. It sure makes a difference in how far one has come to be sober and living with God. Yes, there is that God word again, he and I are best of friends on a daily basis. I have to have a higher power with me at all times. Call me co-dependent..lol However, it seems to work for me to have gone through these changes and end up not hung over and up and early like I am now. What a miracle once I read over what I just wrote. If you want what I have just take a few steps from AA and work them and then you become a better more productive human being, and you might help change someones life . I write this for me to loook back on and it is interesting to note that I have about 900 people that read this blog a month. So people are interested in how I live I guess. I hope it helps someone. Have a good Saturday, and God Bless. Christopher Hyer.

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Life is Complicated Drunk , When Sober Life Changes

Hello, and welcome to my personal journal. I was thinking this evening how complicated life is. However, it really does not have to be. I was watching a movie and it was disturbing , so I walked outside and watched my Labrador Retriever enjoy her back yard, and even myself.

When I was drinking I was always in the moment, and yes I remember seeing some pretty things that God gives us all, like the Ocean, beaches and fish where I use to live on N Padre Island, Texas. It was beautiful most of the time. I was high most of the time also. At night I was always high and beginning my drinking for the night. Therefor I did not do much after about 7 or 8 PM at night except for the photographs of surfing I use to take on a daily basis on the island. If there was no surf I would drive down the coast to take pictures of the birds, and Pelicans that were so spiritual to me and my friend Harry. I will discussm,"Harry" in another part of my journal. He was a big influence to me even during my drinking and pot smoking times over eight years ago. He is dead now , but I will never forget what he taught me about the bible and God. He was a gentle man and a really cool person that I could relate to and I deeply miss him, however like he said to me. You and I are partners in Christ, and I agreed and still agree . He is with me through the day and the night.

Back to why I wrote tonight , I was sitting there watching my puppy just run and hop like a bunny around the yard and sat there in my lawn chair and started looking at the trees and how green the leaves were, and my roses that I don't too good of care of, and they were blooming up a storm. God , I thought is speaking to me and showing me the beauty of life, in a new concept, that I am understanding. The relaxing warm air blew in my face and my puppy was running through the sprinkler system and playing with the water,. She was showing off to me how beautiful the backyard of my house really is and spiritually I was really enjoying the peace from all this. I have not been very stressed out lately , but I do get lonely, but that is my own choice.

Anyway it is good to be sober tonight and July 4th was just another day for me and my puppy. We Bbq a few hamburgers so it would feel like a holiday and I watched a lot of movies, which I do when I have nothing else to do. I also read about Anxieties and how to deal with them, as I am very much the Panic Disorder type of person. I am being treated for Panic and I am looking for other ways in which to cope with my panic. If you have this you know how it feels to not have some type of meditation or medication to go through life with ease. That is another story. So that is wbout it for this July 5th. I have to wake up early and start my work day off, and the good thing is I am not stressed . Pray my prayers and go to bed. Life is just a merry go round at times. I am learning how to love life. Christopher Hyer

Friday, June 3, 2016

Sobriety and the Internet "huh"

Well, interesting enough, I started writing this blog about 7 years ago and I have about 400 readers monthly . So you are reading what was intended on being a personal journal abut my sobriety and living life. Thank you for finding an interest in this blog. I don't care if a thousand people read this a month, I am not making any money for it..Anyway, I had my AA Birthday night last week and 20 people turned out to listen to what I had to say. It really was a large crowd for my group as we are a small group of usually about 6- 10 people showing up to meetings. I was glad that there were people interested in what I had to say.
I wrote most of what I wanted to say down before going to the meeting as I was the only speaker. There was a fellow from the treatment center, called La Hacienda that was there, he was alright I guess. Treatment centers trip me out. They take all your money when you go into one and if you have no previous association with AA , it can really throw you for a loop. Especially if you don't stay sober when your 30 days are up. Then you lost about 60k from La Hacienda and then they beg you to come back. Shit, I understand that a lot of celebrities and musicians go to this treatment center, even more than the Betty Ford clinic in California. You would think there would be some type of warranty with your money. I guess what I am saying is that if you have not fallen off a cliff and lost everything , please get yourself some free help from the Salvation Army or something like this organization. It is no country club , but I have been there in Ft Worth and I did stay sober for about 4 years because the damn place scared the crap out of me. Scared straight!! Maybe that is the answer instead of expensive country club spa locations that cater to the rich and famous.

These are only my opinions but in real life when you get out of the country club setting , you might still have a job and a house and a spouse but nine times out of ten most have lost all. This is not true for everyone, granted we all hit our own bottom when we decide it or alcohol and drugs have taken our money and cars and caused relationships to dry up. There is hope for everyone, including myself. staying sober for eight years is the most I have ever been like this and I don't ever see myself going back to the old way of living because I was not living, I was dying..

Truth, is I am living a great life, now. Yes , there are some downfalls, but I am hitting them straight on with honesty and truthfulness.It is so much better than all the lies I use to tell people tomake myself feel good, and I did feel good when I was high or stoned. I feel good straight now also, and it takes a few months or years to feel like I do right now. I would be a fool to go back to the past and re-live my whole crushing living with booze and drugs. I think about it at times that I had fun parties, but in reality, I was not having that much fun. I was drunk or high and just existing in my body. We all have addiction traits , like to chocolate or ice cream. However , they do not change the way you think or communicate with the world. They are fun addictions that need control. I drink Swepps Soda Water all the time and I am addicted to the bubbles and frosty feel in my mouth. It is like a ber , if you know where I am coming from. I even get virgin Bloody Mary drinks at the bar sometimes because I like them. However , I don't go to the bar on a monthly basis. I am pretty much working at something everyday. I feel like I am excelling in every day and accomplishing something as stupid as washing my clothes or taking the dog for a walk. These are things I never did when I was using alcohol or drugs. in the past I just sat at home and painted some pretty far out pictures with oil paint and got high, I saw stuff and painted them. They were graphic and I can even do this sober, but it took a while for my artistic self to realize I did not need to smoke a joint to paint. I guess we never forget the past and remeber the good times more than the bad. I think that is where AA helps me out. I wish you al a good weekend and I hope you enjoy my blog. Keep coming back it just gets more and more interesting I think..lol  Christopher Hyer

Friday, January 29, 2016

How To Be a Sponsor in Social Sobeirty

In AA there are people with lengths of sobriety, it could be 6 months or longer , and if you work the steps you should of gotten to twelve on the list. Now I say you should of, meaning that you thoroughly worked each and every step and have a concept of the program and how sponsoring works . You should have a sponsor already also before sponsoring, but these are not rules, just suggestions.
What does a sponsor do? They are a person that you can call on during the day and night when you have problems or just feel uneasy with a living situation. They are not your last answe, they will give answers that are AA driven , and for your sobriety. Most sponsors turn into lifelong friends, but there are a few new comers out there, that abuse the policy. A good sponsor will sit down and go over the Big Book with you and help you understand what you son't understand in the books of AA. If they don't have the answer, they will find it. They are not saints or anyone that is higher up in a AA group. These sponsors are friends of the program wiling to help others to stay sober. Like the buddy system.
They are helpers in living life to its fullest for the person that might need help puling away from a liquor store and telling their them to throw the drink out. These are rare things that happen but they do happen.They do not lend money or provide shelter but they might have ideas as to where one can go if the alcoholic is homeless.
In sponsoring you can run across a group of real interesting good and bad people. I have met both in sponsoring and have let go of two of them because they were whiners and did not want help. They wanted answers to things I had no idea about. They wanted money, and when one comes into AA sometimes there is no money in your pocket and it is ok to help someone with cash, but you have to put a stop on this. Anyway , if your a sponsor you are working the program as it is written and it does help one to do this activity. I highly suggest you sponsor someone that needs this. Have a nice day!

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Social Sobriety Today in 2016

What exactly is social sobriety? That is a really good question, I would have to say it is meant to mean there are several human beings that believe they can socially drink and end up alcoholic and then there are the standard human being that can socially drink and put down the beer or glass and walk away from this alcoholic beverage.You can still be very social and sober and not have to worry about making a ass out of yourself . This is a good thing , is it not? How many people go to company drinking or cocktail parties and drink way too much, I would put it half of them drink to much. I don't think that is too many people to include, it does not mean they are alcoholic , however if they get pulled over after the party and get a DWI, then they just might have a legal issue or they drink way too much.

Socially speaking in a sober manner can keep you out of a lot of trouble around friends and those at bars. I think most would agree with me that staying socially sober is best for most people. You would not make the mistake of saying words that might hurt a friend and you would think before you act on a situation. It would be like asking a girl to dance out at a nightclub, I would think she would like to smell a good clean breath talking to her than a guy smelling of Whiskey and stumbling around like a fool. I could be wrong but I think I chose a good title for this blog unintentionally.

Now living sober is not the easiest way for most of us, it does get easier as the days and years move forward. I just finished a E Book on sobriety in 2016 , please purchase this and read the information. It is very conclusive on why we drink and places to get help, and places that may work better than treatment at these country club style treatment centers. There is a spiritual side to this E Book as well and why we include God into our program of alcoholics anonymous and why you don't have to include God. It is alll by choice and buying this book is by choice also.

Social Sobriety in 2016 is no different than staying sober for one more year, you could look at this as a New Years resolution. I really don't make these New Year resolutions because I think they are foolish, that is my opinion, but for the sake of this blog post I am using this metaphor. Taking the drink idea one day at a time, what does that mean. Simply ,just not drinking for 24 hours than doing all over again, and attending meetings of AA is a must, as if you get to far behind as I have at a point , you lose the grasp as to why you are staying sober, until you hear a newcomer come in and realize that this person could be yourself, then you start attending more meetings, in my case. God Bless and have a great day.

Saturday, January 23, 2016

Defeating Drugs And Death a Social Sobriety E- Book Special

It is Saturday 1/23/2016 and I just returned from an AA Meeting , I am working on a another E Book that should be more conclusive to the individual person and how to combat drugs and drinking. This will come out soon. With up to date ideas and ways of controlling your urges and a list of treatment options , even free treatment centers you can get in touch with.
It is imparative that you start working on yourself today, not the next day, because you may not have another day left in you.
If you read this blog then you already are sober or thinking about being sober, or you just have an interest in what I have to say. Whatever the reason, please be on the look out for my next E Book.
Have a great day and stay sober. This is all about helping others whom might need help. Help someone or help yourself today.

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Depression and Sobriety: Do they conflict?

I write this blog to keep track of certain stages in my life as I live sober day to day and try to keep my head high. There are times like now, where I am questioning my outlook into the future. I have started a new franchise and it is not going very well. I have ben working PT as a Uber driver and this is fine, but not many rides lately. Therefor the money I was making has dwindled down to the point I have to borrow. I am looking for a full time job right now, not as hard as I should casue I don't know exactly what I can do.

When I was drinking almost eight years ago, wow..I had problems with getting work cause I had so many jobs I bounced to and from. They were usually white collar jobs and I learned quite a bit about interviewing and quitting. The experience from the past is now different in my present state. I lost my good paying job and I dwindled into Ebay and made a smal fortune but that was lived fast. Then I got this idea of a franchise I bought into and this is stale right now. I need advertising, and blogging has helped bring more business , however not enough to sustain a living from this new position.

I am very creative , with art, music and photography, I know how to dress the part in the role in which I decide to put myself in. I have so many talents that possibly if I focused on one of them I could make a living at one of these hobbies. I am 52 and the age thing bothers me today. I don't really look this old but it is getting harder to do a few things I use to could accomplish in my youth. I am lonely and have not even had a date in over ten years. I feel like I need a vacation from life , I seem to always be chasing jobs and money. Maybe this is the real world, but it has gotten to the point I get depressed when I am at a roadblock.

Alcohol and drugs are not the answer nor have they even entered my mind, but a solution to my problems right now have been positive cause I have stayed sober this long. I have the help when I need it now, and I don't lie about how my life is really going. I face life in a truthful manner and discuss this with my family. They seem to respect the fact that I have taken action and have not let myself get down and keep pushing forward, where back in the day I just gave up. So Sobriety and depression can go hand in hand. However there is a light at the end of my tunnel. Just not sure which way God is jerking me toward . Is it left or right? Is Chris suppose to be going on this little hayride and into the unknown again sober.

God is in my prayers for everything and everyone , and I include myself. Living life on life's term is not very easy to me at this point in my life, however, I am doing this. Fell glum and try to perk up but it is difficult as the days fly by. I am always busy looking for signs on the Internet or marketing my company. So I just dont give in and up. 10.28.2015