Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts

Thursday, August 17, 2017

All is Good in Sobriety

It has been some time since I have posted anything, I have been too busy with my new job and traveling almost every day. Yes I even travel by plane with my work. I have beat my fear of flying sober. That is one of several miracles that has happened to me in recent weeks. I truly believe that if you follow what you think Gods plan is for you and live this plan sober , that miracles will come true. I have talked about it and lived these miracles for about eight years ow, and because I am sober I am able to remember them and tell them to you.

My higher power is God and he listens to me and answers me when its his time not mine. I am very happy right now making a goood income and living a good life. Staying sober in the months I did not have a job I stayed busy doing things that led up to me getting my job. I woke up early and looked for work just like I had a job and several weeks later i landed a good paying and family business position that I am comfortable with finally. It is not easy but it is a challenge and God challeges me every day. You have to keep an open mind and say Yes I can do this. Even when in doubt, the fear goes away when you hand this over to God. Have a blessed day. Chris

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

July 4th,2017 A Day to Stay Sober

What better thing to do today then to stop drinking alcohol than the 4th of July, 2017? Yeah, I know it is celebration time, however, is there not a day that is celebration time? A person who is not alcoholic does not think this the day to get hammered, but a day to spend with the family and kids . An alcoholic by this time of day has already possibly had the first drink to make it through the morning shakes and jitters. The alcoholic cannot control his drinking because it is a disease like cancer. Until the alcoholic gets true help he will keep up his drinking no matter what you say, because he cannot stop on his own will. You are not to blame for the alcoholic's ways, his brain is wired differently and he just wants you to shut up about his habit and let him live his day, even though deep inside he would like to quit.

So what do you do when you have a loved one that drinks and does not stop drinking. One answer is a treatment center and yes they are free in most cities in the USA. They are not nice like the Betty Ford Clinics, but all treatment centers are the same, they get the alcoholic off the drink for at least a short period of time. The other option is to make the alcoholic leave and not come back, which is hard to do for any one's family but a necessity is to make sure that the alcoholic knows you will not put up with his drinking. If drunk he will complain and leave because he is tired of hearing you bitch about his drinking, but then as most drunks will do , they will call you back sober and tell you they have a plan for not drinking. Beware of this plan , and if does not involve some type of counseling or AA , do not let the alcoholic come home. We alcoholics are quite manipulative and know how to get what we need and want. Most alcoholics are very smart and intelligent working citizens, they are not the bums that you see underneath a bridge in a dark long coat. They will be this person if they do not quit and lose all and get locked up in prison or jail. I have met them all.

Sometimes jail really helps an alcoholic or drug abuser, I don't recommend this but I have seen it work in other cases. It is a drastic way to sober up , and the treatment center is not usually there to help with withdrawals. Many people get busted for DUI and DWI on this weekend, and other weekends as well. You see an alcoholic hass many holidays even though he would not call them this. Drinking socially is not drinking beer after beer for a 12 pack in a couple of hours. Your not drinking for the taste but for the effect it has on you and you enjoy this effect or addicted to the feel good effect.
Today is a great day to start drinking water or soda's and not pick up a beer for just today, then when work comes in the morning you might think of doing the same thing, and if you have a problem with not drinking on the next day call AA and discuss this with someone. You can do this and there is help 24 hours a day with so many of us recovering alcoholics with phones you can talk to. We have lived this life of lies and hurting our families, we know where you have been, don't feel ashamed as you will not surprise us that use to drink. Good Luck Today and have a Happy 4th of July this year 2017. Chris Hyer

Friday, May 19, 2017

Social Anxiety and staying Sober

I found this article in my email and I found it o be true about anxiety and people's perception and reality about anxiety. I hope you enjoy this article. Chris

The Three Steps to Dealing with Social Anxiety

At this point we established that trying to avoid or get rid of the feeling of social anxiety usually backfires. It leads to more social anxiety in the long run and you end up restricting your life and ridding it of all meaning and fun.
So here are three steps (backed up by decades of studies) that actually work:

STEP 1: ACCEPT YOUR ANXIETY

Social anxiety is not the enemy. It’s a feeling. A primal “warning” signal from your body to keep you from danger. Problem is, it was designed to keep you safe from wild animals and falling rocks, not strangers and pretty girls.
So when you notice anxiety coming up, together with all the negative thoughts, feelings, and sensations, sit with it. Don’t push it away, or change it in any way. Instead, let it be there, and really experience what it’s like to feel the fear.
Observe it like a curious scientist, without putting any judgment on it. You don’t have to like the fear, but you can learn to accept and embrace it as it is.
Notice where in your body you can feel it the most. What happens when you take a deep breath? When you hold eye contact with a stranger, does the fear get stronger? Stand up straight and lift your head up. What happens then?
Don’t try to change what you feel. Simply notice what happens. Instead of pushing the anxiety away, observe what’s going on. This trains your mind that anxiety in social situations is not something that needs to be avoided.

STEP 2: DO WHAT YOU DEEPLY CARE ABOUT

We usually feel the most vulnerable and the most anxious in the areas we value most in life.
I’ve never met a socially anxious person who didn’t care about having friends or connecting with people.
Instead of fighting anxiety, let anxiety be your guide towards what you care about most. There’s a good chance that situations where you get the most nervous, are the ones that matter most to you.
Being aware of this makes it easier to face your fears. One question we often ask our coaching clients is:
What are the things that are so important to you that you’re willing to feel anxious or nervous to experience them?
Think about it like this. When you are on your deathbed, do you want to look back on a life where you haven’t felt any anxiety, you never felt awkward, and you were always comfortable — but you also never really went all in, you missed out on parties, and never talked to the attractive stranger on your way home?
The other option is to look back on a life where you often felt nervous, anxious, and insecure — but it was a life filled with adventures, parties, random encounters with strangers, and deep connections.
So take a minute and really reflect on this:
What is so important to experience that you’re willing to feel a little anxious?

STEP 3: CONFRONT YOUR FEAR

This is the hardest part, but it’s also the most important one.
It might mean walking up to a pretty girl. It might mean talking to people you don’t know at a party. Or it might mean smiling at the cashier, asking your boss for a raise, or speaking up at a meeting.
There’s no easy way around it, and there are definitively no shortcuts. Be willing to feel the fear and do what matters most to you.
However, know that you don’t have to start with the scariest scenario. You can create a fear hierarchy, jotting down what scares you, and then start tackling the least scary item (e.g., saying “Hi” to a stranger) and working your way up to scarier tasks (e.g., asking a girl for her number).
The more often you face your fears, the better you’ll get at it.


Sunday, March 19, 2017

Treatment Center Bound For Prescription Medication Addiction

I have tried to get off Xanax and Adeerall for the last few weeks and I can't seem to get over the withdrawals. I wil check myself into a local alcoholism and drug addiction Treatment Center on Tuesday. I am not looking forward to another Treatment Center, but I want off these medication for a long time now. I am sober still and even thought what about drining before I go in, and I have decided that tat would be stupid. This is the first time I ever went into a treatment center for drugs that were prescribed for me. No, i took the dosage as told but the dosage is high and I want my life completly clean, regardless of the outcome of treatment. I am going to hold my head up high and go through the motions for 30 days and be grateful that I can even afford to go and get help.I knew early on that these pills could be a problem , but my Psychiatrist insist that I must be on them the rest of my life. I find that incredibly wrong, as I have read and studied the medication I take and it is for th short term not for over eight years. He said I was a special case, but I hardly believe him anymore.

The last job I had to fly many times, and usually the medicine would make me calm and I could fly anywhere, however the potency of this medication has gone down as I had real bad panic atacks and phobias before the flight and lost my job because I was unable to board this flight. This is when I knew I really had a problem. I also noted that my mind has been going up and down during the day  with possible withdrawal from this medication during the day . Its bad shit for the long term. I was told by two other Doctors that they would like to get me off this medication as the dosage was too high. They told e of the complications if I kept on using the medication at the level that I am. I did not want to hear this from anyone, and turned my head, but in reality a addictive perosn knows when he is addictive to something.

My AA friends , which some of them work at this treatment center are behind me, and that feels good. It is nice to be established in the AA world in my little town as this will make me proud that I am not only doing this for myself but others can see that yes, you can get addicted even when not trying to from Doctor prescriptions.So I won't be writing on this blog until I get out in 30 days. I could use your prayers for a speedy recovery, thank you. God Bless and Good Luck to you all. Chris Hyer
 

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Getting Hired When Your Sober

If your in a position like myself, getting hired is tough when there is literally no positions available. I live in Midland , Texas and this is oil field country. If you are a truck driver or have what is called fracing experience, you can have a job right away. If you are sober and looking to stay sober then you have to find a job that will not stress you out so much. When I sobered up I had very few skills and it hurts you when you get older and want to work, as companies will look the other way if you had no experience with the job in which is offered. My biggest problem is I am getting the interviews but I am competing with about 200 people for this one job. It is a statistical nightmare when I think I have the job only to find out they have found someone else better qualified. I am going on 6 months now and I do do part time work in fixing computers on my own. I work half my day driving for Uber and fixing personal computers and half the day searching online for jobs and applying.

There is no reason to drink about my situation , as it will not help me get a job. I also attend quite a few AA meetings as this is good for networking for work. However, in the oil patch things are starting to pick up and when this happens all industry picks up in this small city. I have thought about moving and that thought is still in the air, as I have a home that is paid for and family in this area. I will give it a few more months before I make a city move but not much longer. Health insurance is expensive but I have been able to keep on with my provider, and staying busy writing has helped when I get bored . Try to stay busy because idle hands gets us into trouble , but surely there is  a job out there for me. God willing and I do have a strong conviction to my Lord that he will help me in finding my next career move. Don't let up on the program of AA as you will need it even more right now to keep yourself sane.

If your in my place with not a full time job you know what I am going through. Part of this has been my fault for letting go of jobs that I should of held onto. I will admit I made a few mistakes and I am paying for this move right now. Please have a job before you leave one, as I did not do this a few times, I just quit and that will piss off the employer and make your resume stink, but there are ways around this mess, you just have to be creative. Stay sober and work through your life and consider all posibilities you can and God will help. Have a great day. Chris Hyer

Monday, January 23, 2017

God, Living, Death, and Sobriety

Recently my father lost his wife to a disease and even though we all knew her time had come, reality sets in after a while. My father has not changed, in fact he may be even more bitter about things in life. He is too hard to read. He is alcoholic and it is hard for me to understand when he is down because he is not drinking or if he is always negative like when I grew up. Anyway , the death has not really affected me, as I loved this lady but she was in great pain. I would rather die than live in pain. However I have mental pain and I sure have been praying for God to take my life over and make it tolerable. I refuse to drink over my insecurities, and I refuse to do anything stupid. I think this giving it to God stuff actually works, or it has with me.

I am a loner in the seance that I go to AA meetings to live life, then I try to stay occupied by my Uber driving while I wait and see about future opportunities come. I have hit the computer hard with Resumes and I am getting feedback, but it has been almost 5 months without a steady job. This bothers me and I even have stooped down to convenience stores cause they are always hiring, well no the case with me. It seems the easier the job , the harder it is for me to get hired, yet a computer position or IT position is quite virtually easier for me to get into. Maybe because of my background, I just don't know. I have had a few bites on a couple of jobs I am waiting to hear back from and have gotten off the couch to drive as this keeps my mind occupied and I make a little money .

I have to have help with my bills from my family and I know they are tired of this. I feel like all I am is a job seeking fool. I am not being picky now, as the time has been rolling on. However if I look back seven years ago , I would of just drank my problems away and that is the only difference with me at this point in my life is that I have stayed sober. I hold onto every penny I have and do not waste money . Sobriety is the key with God on my side, and I do believe he is on my side or I could not keep my head high, as the night falls I get restless and anxious about bedtime and the worying I do before I sleep. I try to giv that to God also and it works if I think about it. God is doing for me what I cannot do for myself, He is telling me I am worth a damn in this world, even though I get depressed at times and try to watch comedies at night that are easy to swallow and maybe make me laugh. Laughing is hard, and my relationship with my family is all about work and money. I just pray that soon all will be ok, and the job crisis will end and the borrowing of money will stop , so I can live life as I expect it to be lived. Have a good day for we not know what the next will bring, and this is so true. Chris Hyer

Saturday, December 3, 2016

Christmas is Almost Here How Do you feel about this?

Sobriety is a wonderful feeling in the morning , waking up to no headaches, and no remorse for what you may have done the night before. Well, Christmas is upon us in a few weeks, and I beg of you not to let that interfere with your sobriety. It can be easy to slip into old habits of drinking and smoking dope. The reason is that you might be going home to family and friends that do these things and they might expect you to do them with you. Run as fast as you can from this place. Find a hotel room and find a meeting if this is a strong connection to you starting back your old ways. I have had to do this once, and I am glad, and my family understood, and I still had the best Christmas ever.

I am like a little boy when Christmas comes around, there is a spiritual feeling I get in my stomach, and the only bummer is on Christmas day , I usually don't have a tree  and there are no presents, as I am 53 and my family lives in so many cities, that I end up with myself going for Christmas Lunch with my mother and her husband. We do exchange gifts but it is just not the same. Then after we eat , I go home to an empty house. SO my Christmas last for about an hour and maybe two hours. That is called growing older I guess. I still look forward to this day and dress up for lunch and try to make something out of this day. There is no reason to drink about it, because imagine what that would do? Fro me it would ruin my life. So take it easy and enjoy what relatives you may have and give thanks to God that you are alive one more year to celebrate Jesus Christ's Birthday!! That in itself should be enough for Christmas. Chris Hyer

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Thanksgiving and What it Means To Sober Alcoholics

Thanksgiving is a time spent with family to get together and enjoy each others company. My family is split , so it usually means having to drive to two towns and celebrating with my Mother and my Father. This is difficult and I spend most fo the day going between homes than I do actually staying there and relaxing. My family is always on the go , so relaxing is something that rarely happens for me, as I am always on my toes trying to pleasure whom I am with.
As an alcoholic , there is seldom any drinking going on at either house for fear that I might want to indulge, this has been going on for years. I really don't pay much attention to this but when I leave they pop open the liquor at my fathers house, SO am I in the way? I don't care really they should not invite me if they did not want me to come. Putting up the liquor is ridiculous as I have no desire to drink it any way. People do not understand an alcoholic can got o the store at anytime and buy the drink of their choice in the morning , afternoon or late at night. Just be cause it is a holiday does not mean I am going to drink or not drink. Relatives are only trying to help, I understand, but in a way, they hinder the relationship. Let them be what they are, and if stuck ina situation where liquor is being a part of Thanksgiving and it gets in your mind, just leave and make a excuse.

SO enjoy your family as we all need them in our lives, do not cause a problem at these gatherings and leave if you decide it is time. It is only one day and you have 364 other days to work with in your sobriety. Personally , I don't think of the Holidays as much anymore, and every holiday is not a drinking day, it was everyday when I was drinking some eight years ago.

So go out and eat with your family if you have one, if not find one at a free meal place and help out. That is doing 12 step work even if everybody is sober, you are helping others who cannot help themselves. I might as well do some volunteer
work myself at Thanksgiving, it would give me an excuse to get out of traveling to please everybody in my family. Chris Hyer


Friday, February 12, 2016

Being Positive when Feeling Negative in Sobriety

Sometimes it is hard to be positive with so much negativity in this world. When you get sober, and start to see the light. The world can be a positive one or it can look awfully negative. That is where the steps really come into play , is how to accept the good with the bad. You might of lost your spouse since you sobered up and are going through court. It is a difficult time for most people getting sober. You sometimes have to find a new job and this ads stress to your already existing problem of staying sober. Do not get overwhelmed, and take  it slow and one step at a time. If you let all these things hit your head at once, problems could began to unfold. Talk to your sponsor to see how you can weed this and that out. Staying sober is still number one, if you can stay sober these other obstacles will come into place sooner or later with Gods help.


Take positive steps in solving these mysteries you could not solve when you were drinking. It is very important to let the courts know that you have sobered up and intend on staying this way. Tell the courts you go to AA and please go to AA, just in case they check up on you. In  my AA group there is always a bunch that have to have court ordered papers to hand in to thier probation officer, keep these up and be honest about these. These papers are a test from the court to see if you can stay sober through a program for alcoholics. Even if you cannot relate to an alcoholic and have papers from the court I suggest you keep these up to date as they are checked.

Keep a smile on your face cause you are sober today, and any problem that comes before you can be solved through God and this program. You just have to believe this. Myself I get caught up into negative thinking all the time, so even seasoned alcoholics that are sober must remember where they came from in order to keep a positive outlook on the day.Life is not easy , even sober. However it is tolerable and things can be chaged to make your life positivve if you want them this way. You are the only one besides God that knows how to change your situation. Pray about this and the answer will come.Chris

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Uber gone in Midland, Texas- a Danger for Midlanders

As a Uber driver in Midland, Texas I can inform you that we kept quite a bit of drunks off the road in this county.On February 2, 2016 , Uber pulled out of Midland, Texas due to the way Midland City Council had tried to arrange an ordinance to fit Midland, Texas. This evidently did not work , and who is to blame? Seeing that Uber had established a agreement with most of the citizens of Midland County , I would have to say it was both the City of Midland City Council and Uber. Midland City Council wanted their way and Uber already had their way of running this service in many of the places of the world.It's a shame cause now their will be more DWI accidents and deaths due to not having Uber in town.

Why does the public drink themselves into oblivion? Well, partially there are a lot of drugs in this town and drinking is a pastime with a majority of locals.Yes , we have treatment centers in the area and they are packed.We have several AA groups and they are packed also with people that are court ordered and those whom want sobriety from their own experience of drinking too much.

Remember alcoholics have a disease and it is alcohol that is the drink that makes us want more. The more we drink the more satisfied we are.

Honestly Uber leaving , does not bother me. They kept cutting wages for drivers and I was getting sick and tired of the drunks I picked up nightly, and sometimes during the day. However it laid off about 100 drivers in a area where there is no work .People needed their Uber driving jobs and the goverment stepped in and made it impossible for Uber to operate under these conditions.What a shame, please be careful driving in this town, even more cautoius than before, because these people will still go out and get drunk but they have no alternative now for a sober driver to get them home.

Monday, January 25, 2016

Sober in 2016 , Take the 1st Step

The only action , one must take , is to quit drinking. That is the first and most important step in becoming a drug free and alcoholic free person. Is to not smoke a joint or have a drink for 24 hours. See if you can do this today. I know you can, even if you have no long term goal of stopping, just stop for today. If you cannot stop for one day and your addiction has you out of control, get help today from a clinic or a doctor. They will find you help. You just have to be willing to stop, thats about it.

Why today, because it is Monday and it is almost the start of a new month, that seems to be a good reason. However the better reason is you might not be here tomorrow if you don't stop drinking or drugging today. Start reading
the bible if you don't have a AA Big Book. Go to AA even if you feel miserably, there is always one other person there that feels the same as you. Get you a 24 hour chip while at this meeting and let it mean something to you. This is a chip for wanting to stop for just 24 hours. It will prove to you that indeed you can quit.

Why do I care f you quit? There are sevral reasons, you could be crossing my path today and if drunk you could hit me and not know exactly what you have done, I don't want this to happen in your life or mine. You could die overnight if still drinking because of a liver problem. Yes these things happen even to sober alcoholics that have relapse and come back into the program. I , personally want you to quit to maybe see that it is possible to feel like yourself for once in a day. Some of us drank daily from the time we woke up to the time the sun goes down or until we passed out. To pass out might mean death, and I don't want your family to experience this and believe me your family does care about you.

Don't give up hope and you can make it happen this Monday just for one day! I promise you can.

Saturday, January 23, 2016

Defeating Drugs And Death a Social Sobriety E- Book Special

It is Saturday 1/23/2016 and I just returned from an AA Meeting , I am working on a another E Book that should be more conclusive to the individual person and how to combat drugs and drinking. This will come out soon. With up to date ideas and ways of controlling your urges and a list of treatment options , even free treatment centers you can get in touch with.
It is imparative that you start working on yourself today, not the next day, because you may not have another day left in you.
If you read this blog then you already are sober or thinking about being sober, or you just have an interest in what I have to say. Whatever the reason, please be on the look out for my next E Book.
Have a great day and stay sober. This is all about helping others whom might need help. Help someone or help yourself today.

Friday, January 22, 2016

Sobriety, The Reason to Get Sober Today in 2016

There are a multitude of reasons that starting a new year , in that starting a new life can be obtained today. Sobriety is the key focus of what you have set out to achieve and ready to start with a fresh attitude towards the world and yourself. Make a determined effort to go to a AA meeting today and meet one person, even if it is to say ,"Hello". This will start your journey into a new world where all things are possible . A new beginning to a hopeless end with drinking.

Go to just one AA meeting today, and they have these meetings all over your city if you live in a large metropolitan area. You just might make a difference in someone else life. You might see a co-worker or an attorney that you have known, but do not feeel ashamed, as they are there for the same reason you are there, to stay sober for just today and find materials to help you stay sober. Find a sponsor in this meeting, they will usually point people out that can sponsor a recovering alcoholic. Yes, that would be you, but you have to take the first step into this building to start your day off on the right foot.

The possibilities are endless what you can accomplish by going to this first AA meeting. Here are a few that may happen to you. You go and then come home and tell your spouse or child that you went to AA and they just might put a smile on their face. Once you have left you now how an idea that there are many people from homeless persons to doctors that are attending these meetings, alcohol has no discrimination on whom the disease chooses. This may shock you at the knowledge or stories that you hear , casue they may sound like yourself talking while in this meeting. I am sure you will find something familiar with going to this AA meeting.

If you leave and think you still are not an alcoholic , then go and keep drinking and in the back of your mind you will always know there is a place for you at alcoholics anonymous if you so need this in your life. You may not be alcoholic, I beg of you to please ask in a meeting what a alcoholic is? They will give you an answer that might fit you or may not. We are not a glum lot of people, we are happy and sometimes sad. We are a group of survivors from this disease. You may try another group to see if they are more on your level, almost all groups are the same but some are smaller and others larger. Take the leap of faith and at least find out if you really have a problem or if it is someone else just saying you have a problem. Get it out of your voice and head to do something today!! Thank You



Monday, May 18, 2015

Fear of The Unknown and Sobriety

Driven by a thousand forms of  fears we drank to rid ourselves of these fears. Facing fear head on is like facing the Devil and in fact fear is evil. If you think about it, the most fearful things we have today is the not knowing sensation. Not knowing if Jade Helm 15 is an exercise or just a military over run of our country is fear. This is big fear, this is evil fear.

If you think about it this whole fear factor with the military exercise is put in place by our own government. Evil is not stupid, they knew web sites would go up and fear would overcome some people into thinking the odd things they write for us to read on the internet. Mainstream TV is just now getting involved into this fear of ourselves, and it is growing. It is not the time to drink and say , Oh man might as well, the world is coming to an end. That is giving into fear and that is exactly what the Devil  wants is for us to give in to fear of an invasion. Personally , I think this is a show and an act of stupidity of our government to see how frightened they can get people, to run to the hills type of thing.

For those of us that believe in God we fear nothing, not even a government that does not acknowledge our pledge of allegiance, as I was trying to remember this the other day. It is a shame that so many Veterans have to be look at this as an invasion but I can understand where they think. They fought for our country and I still believe in our military . The military has orders and they will go through with them, but fear not any blood shed during this exercise, because I don't believe there is enough American soldiers that would shoot their own people. If provoked by some activist this could be a different story , and that I can see happen with all the mis-information being passed along the internet. How was this provoked by our US Army Generals in releasing documents and statements of their planned activity in our country. Did we really need to know this, as they do these exercises daily across the country., yes to promote fear so we should fear our Federal government.Why? Who really knows but of course there is changes happening in our own country.

So say your prayers for our soldiers and pray for the President and God Bless him for he may not know what is wrong and what is right.Fear starts with the high command and then ripples down to the people in ways where technology goes around the world in seconds through pages like this one.

I am for the Federal government having our soldiers here on US land, they are not at risk here, therefor their lives will be spared and this is what this is all about . Saving lives and making our soldiers stronger in battle The fear factor I could do without but thanks to limited coverage and our resources on the web we get several opinions that make seance to us and we believe someof them..Go sober and tell a service man you love him or her for their work..DO not bow down to fear though...God Bless...