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Showing posts with the label addiction

The Superbowl Sober

Well in our country the number one show last night was the Superbowl 53 which was quite a game. I remember past Superbowls for the last ten years but beyond that, I was always drunk. Yes, beer was to be had for sure at a Superbowl party, no excuses, however, that is not true. It took me a long time to realize that every occasion something special happens is not a drinking occasion. This was one of those nights, so what did I do? I don't watch football much at all anyway, but I did enjoy being safe at home and watching the colorful game by myself, without alcohol. That is how I live my life. I am sure there were a group of AA people watching the game but I really switch between channels when I watch football. Since being sober I spend a lot of my time alone anyway and this night was no different than any other night for Chris. I am not lonely, I just prefer to enjoy what I want to do and I enjoy being by myself for the most part. When I am in groups I talk and enjoy a group crowd f…

Find Your Inner Demon and Stop Addiction

All of us have a demon type disease that wants pleasure from activities that are or could be harmful to your health. Maybe you have no addictions, if not you would not understand where I am coming from. However, built-in addicted persons are this evil pleasure maker for addicts. We get off on feeding this evil being by drinking too much or any type of drug addiction. This applies to all addictions including gambling, that we want to feel different than we do right this second. Some of us are willing to hand this over to God and AA to get rid of the affection in alcohol. This also means you will probably have another addiction to take the pleasure point in your body to new highs. We, addicts, choose to smoke, drink to much coke, or ice cream and cake, and a good portion of us are overweight in eating to control our nerves. Try to discover those things that you might be doing that are probably not good for you and that you may be obsessed with what might be killing yourself such as snuf…

Addictions, Addictions and Addictions for Sober People

One addiction to another addiction. That is how my life seems to be right now. I have fought off the alcohol addiction then it leads me into the gambling addiction. I have a chocolate addiction, and I have obsessive thought addiction and the list goes on and on. My sister in town for the holidays said Chris, just take one problem at a time. Well, she is right but I have so many problems at a time which one to start with. People that are sober and in the AA program talk of how happy they are right now sober. I have to admit I am happier sober than when I drank all the time. I wonder if this is the happiness recovering alcoholics are talking about. My daily living is a struggle at times, however, and it takes control over my mind and body. I get worn out from the stress I put on myself, therefore, I start another addiction to something. I don't even try but it seems as though I cannot get enough done in one day or do this or that right. I am a perfectionist and it bums me out to mak…

Sober after The Holidays

It's been nine years since I have taken a drink of alcohol, and I have to say that a holiday without alcohol is ok with me. After the first few years, it was strange to not drink during the entire Holiday binge. I missed out a lot of Christmas's and was a mellow drunk back in the day anyway, so most did not know I was wasted. Thank God another year is about to come I guess. I can't stop it but I can make changes to my behavior that need fixed/ One thing is to find more to do with my spare time beside housework, get involved and socialize, I am very closet minded and comfortable in my little own world, which can be a hazard to my health, I get to thinking too much. This is called boredom I think, here it has been almost ten years and I love life, need to change my personal habits such as sitting on the couch and watching TV and resting. Maybe it is just a case that I am not used to knowing how to rest? I was always on the go when I was younger I am 55 and a man and I have b…

Nine years of Sobriety and 5 Months of CBD Buds

Like I have said before I write this journal or blog for myself. I am not trying to impress anyone or tell my whole life story. Recently for the past five or six months, I have been trying CBD , which if you do not know what it is let me explain.
CBD from Hemp is what I was smoking, it does not get a person high but it does have healing properties for much medical use. Now, what medical use did I use it for was anxiety or panic? I will say that I tried Vaping CBD, and I thought it did nothing. Then I found out you could buy this like Marijuana flowers or buds. I purchased the Buds legally at a Vape store in my city. I rolled up Hemp cigarettes and smoked a few hits over the span of the last few months. The funny thing is I felt like it was helping me with Panic and possibly was, or was it just that I missed the taste of real pot and the smell and buds were beautiful. The only problem is CBD is not regulated nor is specified what type of Nutrient, Hemp can be, plus the negative bonus o…