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Showing posts from July, 2013

Life As We Know It

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Life as we know it. What a concept. How are we to determine what is best for us to do today. Do we pray everyday for a miracle to happen? It is difficult sometimes to know what to do. I have spent a life time of doing what I wanted to do, and not getting anything accomplished. I worked a numerous amount of different jobs from my drinking days. Most of these jobs were white collar jobs and now I get confused about who I really am. It is hard to put on a resume all you have done and make sense of this to an employer. There are ways of working around this and I have done this. I try to combine my strengths into one category and put time into this on my resume. Being self -employed offers this advantage. You can have multiple experiences doing many things and list them. It has helped me in my job quest, and it is being truthful.

Being a recovered alcoholic is difficult for the job seeker back into the marketplace. You have held many positions and you must convince the employer that you are…

Running With The Lord

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Its funny how life just keeps throwing us curve balls in life. We make life what it is today. God provides us with a brain and activities to work our brain with. With so many of us with years of drinking and drugs , we are all miracles. It is a miracle that one can get sober and still function in this world as a productive and empowering human being. We have great insight as to what not to do , and what to do. By working the steps in the AA program, How could you go wrong? You really can't , you give your life over to God and he takes control. You have to be willing and able to do this. He makes this possible , by giving us the strength of sobriety , and prayer, all things can be accomplished , big and small. I am living proof of this.

I quit a job where there was verbal abuse and it brought me into another job , in only one days time. It is amazing how this life works when we let go and give effort. Prayer does it for me, and constantly not giving up. I am a fighter , more than I …

Good Monday Morning

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Well the sun is out and the birds are chirping and , we are all alive. This is a good deal , right? God grant us the serenity to do the things we need to do. I have a lot of things to acomplish toda
y. I had a rough week last week and this week will be ok starting with today. I was lucky enough to have an interview inperson and over the phone with a large corporation last friday. I am looking at a very good position with a manufacturer this afternoon. I have the qualifications and I will be working mostly by myself. I will have to travel to Chicago, Huntington Beach, and Atlanta on occasion. SO this would be nice . When things get tough, and you hang in there like I have been, good things seem to happen. I call them miracles. God miracles.

I am feeling pretty secure with what this fellow has to offer me in the way of work today. I hope he decides to take me on. I will pray about it, and hopefully it will come true. I will not know until this afternoon. I met a girl from Silsbee, Texas …

God I offer Myself To Thee

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I tried and tried to get along with my new manager at work and he is either racist or has a dry sense of humor. I left my job this morning , and reluctantly so. I was asked to put together a machine that I have no idea of what I was doing. I was verbally abused by this man , in a way that was wrong in my mind. He asked if I was a Technician and he was curious as to how good I really was. Hell I only was with them for three days. I am a good technician, and have worked on copiers for over 2 years. The product was different than what I was use to , but I figured they would give me a while to learn theirs. Maybe I took everything the wrong way, but it was like I could not do anything as good as this fellow wanted.

I prayed and prayed about this every morning noon, and night and on the job. I finally this morning had my fill of it and left my key and a note , and my damn screwdriver that He called Richard. He had fired a guy who did not have his tools with him on a job , and just because h…

What usually happens? The show doesn’t come off very well.

The show for me is every day living and working . SOmetimes it does not go very well and that is when I need the strength of God to help me through. I pray in the mornings and read the Big Book beofre work. I ask for his forgiveness, and that I may make it through another day. This is not hard to do , and I pray that my prayers will come to light. So far so good. I am new at my company and I have a lot to learn, I am very tired this morning and would rather stay home. This is my old sick thinking is what I have. I pray for God to lift my sprits and to guide me through today. I pray for my family that they may have a pleasant day. I pray, and pray and pray.

I believe you cannot pray enough, as my prayers tend to come true. I am a hard headed individual that wants to learn what I am doing and it is hard work this time. There is no easy solution. I want to fit in and become a part of something and I am trying to hard , maybe. I will ask God to guide me through today and give me strength a…

Rarely have we seen a person fail !!!

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The rest of this passage is very well known. We try to not take that first drink and we try to make amends while in the program of AA. We try all the time not to step on others toes. Yes, as Alcoholics we try!! Thats all we can do is try to succees in what we are attempting to do. Whether it be work or quitting a drug or drink, we at least give it full effort to try and make use of ourselves. If we don't we have already failed. So trying is number one if you ask me for this program. Try to be the person you want to be and you will be that person.

This is Wed, and halfway through the week ,What can you try to do today that you have not done yet. Something that bothers you makes for good practice. That way you willl have God behind you and you will not fail. Ask God for his help today to try new things out. Ask him to hold you and guide you through the light of the day and the darkness of the night. Try Try Try!!!!God Bless.. Christopher

Updates to Blog For Sobriety

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Since I am recovering from the Dentist, I have decided to make use of this blog as it tends to be growing in numbers around the world. This blog now has a translator, because of the Russian community that is present on this blog. I welcome the Russian Alcoholic and all others from around the world to explore my daily routines and rituals, if you will. This blog is for alcoholics and thos whom might be interested in what alcoholisim is. I put my personal accounts or journal into this and sometimes I just put plain facts from other sites to help those of us that need this.


I will say this , if an alcoholic , you should build your own blog or be writing about your our story in a personal journal, that way you can see how you have been doing . I have found this to be quite an experience and I see how I have grown from hating AA to loving it. I am a proud recovering or recovered person from drinking alcohol and smoking . I write to inform the masses and myself how far I have come and how th…

The Tuesday of Hope for Sobriety

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Well, I made it through my first day of work, only to have my Dental appt. today. I have a few teeth that have to have root canals done to them this morning. I may be out of work for a while or all day. This upsets me because I just started, yet my boss is aware of this situation. I am glad I did nto have to lie about anything, I had to have them done, ASAP, as they are hurting very badly.

The thing with being an alcoholic is we put things off . I do at least and my teeth are bad from years of smoking and drinking. They are getting better, but I have been through three years of reconstruction. I am in the final phase of this Dentist, so hopefully , this will all end soon. I have practically bought a Ferrari for this Doctor. He is good and knowledgeable, and my work knew ahead of time I had to have this work done, so be it.

I will have to take Hydrocodone for the pain and It makes me feel good if I remeber this, I am smart as to only takeing one of these usually, for the pain. I do not w…

Monday Morning Soberiety and New Job

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I start my new job in IT today with a business that is local. I look forward to working outside the house. This is a fortunate position that God has sent my way. I have the jitters a bit this morning but I woke up early and got cleaned up and had enough time to write to this blog. Monday's are usually busy days for most as they set out for the week. I believe that I have found the perfect Christian job , all that work here are Christian and family. They seem to have accepted me and my past alcoholism. I explained to them on my first interview that I was. This is how I am spiritually motivated I said. The man I talked to was impressed, though I was outspoken, it did not hurt my job chance
s. Nor was a drug test even given, I was trusted.

I think working for a Christian company is what God had planned for me, though the work will be difficult, there is training.God does not give us more than what we can handle is what is said, and I believe this and will do my best. I need to calm do…

Sunday and a Beautiful Day to be Sober

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I met a woman last night from CL and she was about my age. We hit it off right from the start aqnd began to talk. She asked about my past , and as honest as I am. She inquired, "You would be hard to be in a committed relationship because what if you decided to drink again?" , Well that stumped me and I said you don't. I can only tel you that I will not in all probability go back to how I was or I will be dead. Shocked , as she seemed to be, I told her I had been as low as I could go this time. I lost my life almost this time when I sobered up, and I will never forget this.

How many of you have had this question brought up to you? It was difficult to swallow at first. Would all women thing the same thing? Do I really care? I would have to  say that I could not give her a good answer. I am not on this earth to please a stranger, I am here to stay sober and productive and make a living. If it comes right down to it , I will never marry again and be just fine. I willl have th…

Promises and Life Mid Afternoon Friday

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I just got home from having lunch with my father in Big Spring, Texas. Here is what happened . I left Midland, Texas at 1130am arrived at a restauraunt at 1215pm in Big Spring , Texas. Had a gyro sandwich and found 100.00 bill on the sidewalk. Pocketed the money and was kinda happy. Got in my car to go back home, and enjoyed the top off and was cruising at 80 MPH and all of a sudden the traffic on the highway stopped. As I pulled up to the accident I noticed a black Dodge Ram, on its top in the other lane next to mine coming the wrong direction and bottles of liquor all around the truck. I saw blood coming from the cab and turned my head so I did not see more, I continued on to my city and the traffic was going up to 100 MPH and I was in wonder as to what the hurry was to get to this hell hole called Midland , Texas. Then a near miss in town by a Big truck, almost hit me, and pushed me off the road. I proceeded to the grocery store to buy stuff. I bought drinks and shampoo, had a lady…

Friday 07/19/2013 God Grant Me Serenity!!

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I am between jobs right now, and though I have secured one starting this coming Monday . I have had dead spots in the day where I have to sit down and just wonder what to do next. I have found that writing has helped in my boredom. I write this blog almost daily and most of those that read this blog are from Russia. I think that is cool, and I hope they get something out of this blog, in fact I write in this for serenity and to help other alcoholics . That is my hope at least , yet it is a journal of my life also. A way for me to reflect upon the days and look forward to the next day. I suggest you start a blog and just start writing what comes from your heart.

Even the pain of daily living can be too much for some of us. If we work these steps , though, we will find that there are things that need to be done. In the cities there are marathon AA meetings and I wish I lived where these happened. I do not and have to wait usually for 8pm meetings and though I find it difficult to go to t…

To Drink is To DIe

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We had to smash the idea that we could drink or it killed us. The Big Book reminds us that controlled drinking was all we wanted to have. We have the disease of alcoholism, and this spiritual malady or "issue man" inside us makes this possible. Inside you may have another drink left in you, don't even think this for a moment. We know to drink is to die. It is our death sentence to take one drink as it tends to lead to another sometimes slowly others it takes just one drink that will lead to another. We have tried all forms of controlled drinking or drugging. Trying it in the morning only or just one in the evening, then to succumb to the fact that we could drink two or more now, back to the races we went, and fell into an insane asylym. Back to treatment or death to most of us.

Please do not believe you can control your drinking, and do not take this test. If you are like myself, it will be the last thing in your mouth, and you will not wake up. This is not living, AA giv…

To my Russian Friends on this site

Здравствуйте,мои русские друзья.Я заметил, чтовы большойчасти аудиториина моем блоге.Яхочу, чтобы вызнаете, что вмоих молитвахи добро пожаловатьна мой сайтв любое время.Я использую translator написать это, чтобывы.А.А.,я считаю, этов вашей стране.Якогда-нибудьхотели бы посетитьРоссию ивстретиться с некоторыми излюдей.Я слышало красоте ия слышу обедности, котораяменя огорчает.Если выалкоголик,и я могупомочь вам сохранитьнекотором смыслетрезвостив вашей жизнипожалуйста, напишите мне.Пусть Бог благословитиесть великий день!

Over 60 percent of my readers are Russian this is what the above message says: Hello , my Russian friends. I have noticed that you are a large part of the audience on my blog. I want you to know you are in my prayers and welcome to my site at all times. I am using a translator to write this to you. AA ,I believe is in your country. I someday would like to visit Russia and meet some of the people there. I hear of the beauty and I hear of the poverty that saddens me. If …

Good Day- Thy Will Be Done, Not Mine

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In a perfect world, my life would go like I see it. I am wrong , in a perfect world my life will go according to how God sees it. What does he see? I look in the mirror and he sees a sober, handsome , individual, that is sober and has his will of God in his mind. Thy will be done, not mine. This is the motto of this day. As I seek employment from different sources, God makes this all possible, where I had no leads a few days ago to having to pick which job best suits me.

God has his ways of telling me what to do. I don't listen at times, and be quite and shut up. I need peacefulness to hear his word to me, and sometimes his word is written in this blog. I read back a few days back and I can't believe I wrote such articles. Some good , others spiritual, and without provocation I adhere to every word I write.

My goal is for the Alcoholic to see what happens when you sober up and live life day to day. 90 days in the program and 90 meetings is great at first , but don't adhere …

All Men Of Faith Have Courage

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In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous , it goes into the fact that we seek spiritual guidance is by no means we lack courage. In fact , this principle of spirituality just means ,"all men of faith have courage". Ok, so I might have read this wrong, but you know what I am talking about if you have worked the steps. A spiritual beginning takes place when we complete step 4 and read aloud to our sponsor step 5 and work step 6. This is done in succession and honestly done. You cannot lie to yourself and another human being the resentments you have. It makes no sense to even try. If you want what millions of recovered alcoholics have , this and all steps are done in honest, and thought out time.

Chris Raymer Speaks!! Work these steps fast and thoroughly so that your road to recovery can lead to step 12 , where you help the newcomer who is clueless as to what AA is all about. We need to help the newcomer come to realize step 1 and get him well off his way onto the other steps as …

William James and AA: The Beginninge of Billl W's Spiritual Malady

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In reading and watching a film about Bill Wilson , AA father and founder. William James , a great Philosopher and Writer from the 1800s to his death in 1910 , had a huge impact on the AA program.  Bill w. goes to explain on his last binge when in an asylum for drinking his last time. He discovered a book by ,"William James",. This book would have a sustained impact on Bill , he found a spiritual connection with God after reading this book and stayed sober from then on.

I dare you to read this book, it is called,"Varieties of Religious Experiences" by William James. He was a man who struck head on with the spiritual malady of living. He is why , possibly AA is what it is. A spiritual program based on the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. His book , is very difficult to read, and the philosophical words and phrases are quite the head on approach that made Bill W. quit drinking.

Bill w. gos on to say he had a spiritual change in his soul and the urge to drink was taken…

The First Six Steps to Sobriety

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Well its Thursday 07/11/2013 and yesterday I did my 5th and sixth step with my sponsor. It was an emotional meeting of sorts. I did not expect to get this way after I submitted my 5th step to my sponsor. I realize now some of the things that I hold deep down inside me that I take for granted. Love for one is what I have to offer to a lot of people, and peace became upon me as I read to him my resentments. I really did not know I resented so many things and that most were a cause from myself. I will make amends to those that I have hurt this week as well. The faster you work theough these steps and heal your inner soul, the better all this AA stuff is. My sobriety is stronger than ever, my conscios contact with the spiritual world is even more evident since I took these steps.

It seems when you read through the steps , a simple feet indeed once you get past step one. However by working the steps outlined by the Big Book, a spiritual beginning takes place again.Another round of peace cam…

Monday and Being Humble

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To be humble, what does this exactly mean? I think I know a little bit about this. Correct me if I am wrong. I am looking for another job , and there are plenty of fast food places to work at. They pay good money , because no one wants to work there. When I say good money , I mean about 14 to 16 dollars and hour. I am having trouble getting a job in IT or any computer related field. SO I was thinking , why not do fast food? I never thought this would be my destiny nor do I want this. The money is there though. I am not qualified for most jobs in my area in oil and gas. I never have worked in a restaurant atmosphere, and don't desire this. I would think this a humbling experience, and I do not want to do this. I may have to though, if nothing alse comes my way.

Why, oh lord does it have to be this way? I have so much experience in other areas, and I would rather move away from here than work in fast food. Maybe that is a idea? I am confused as to what to do, so I pray about this and…

One Day At a Time ; Sobriety

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Taking my life one day at a time. I don't know how good I practice this. I do try to think ahead, because I have to line up my life a few days ahead of time. Taking "One Day at a time", is a difficult step for any of us. I have so much to look forward to in the future, even if right now, I don't see it. I am sober again today and this will be everyday as far as I know, and for today I will be sober. The craving for alcoholic beverages really does not thoroughly go away when I think about this. The ads on Television and going to convenience stores surely throw this shit at me. So , I salivate for about 5 seconds and then I am ok, so the obsession to buy this particular drink has been lifted. Enjoy Stevie Ray Vaughn below for a little "Superstitions"

There are still problems in my daily living and AA helps in taking care of this. I also put in my two cents of , "No I am not going to drink because of so and so. There are problems , but drinking just makes …

Saturday 07/06/2013 ---1 Timothy of the Bible

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"May God our Father and Christ Jesus our Lord give you grace,mercy,and peace" Chapter 1 in Timothy in the bible. 

Wow, what a strong phrase we have been given. Paul in the bible was given control by the command of Jesus, "It is written to Timothy,my true child in the faith".....What a concept, to have the Lord Jesus Christ give one such an honor. To be loved by Jesus , so much that God had appoited Paul to spread the word of God and to trust and have faith in him to do his deed.

Is that what we all seek in reality , is a commitment from others to understand that through faith and love that God has made us into human beings to carry on this message to other human beings. A twelve step for sure, I would imagine."Live a life of Faith " is what Paul says in Timothy and do not stray away into any false promises.

This would hold true for alcoholics," please oh lord help us keep the faith and do not let us go a stray with our own ides" and "Thy will …

God Grant Me!! Sobriety

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In the mornings , I say prayers for the day to begin with and ask for guidance and courage to face the world. It has become habbit, and without prayer in the morning , I would not be complete for the day. It is so much of a habit that I even recite the Serenty prayer a few times to get me going. Do you do this?

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. Sucha strong prayer for living . The short prayer is good for everything in this world. You cannot change the things you can't. It is so true. Love for other animals and human beings seem to take place with the serenity prayer. I don't think about drinking in the morning, that obsession has been removed. I have days where I am not so up . This is true with all of us, though I have not had a bad day since being sober. No hangovers, no headaches, or alcohol on my breath to get off. There is so much to be thankful for this morning.

July 4th was a bit hard to take, yet I woke up this F…

July 4th, God's Grace I am Sober

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Well it's that time of year where in Midland, fireworks happen even though there is a possibility of a good fire happening tonight somewhere. It never cease to amaze me , that they fire these off in and around the town. They are beautiful , if you like rockets blwing up in the sky. I could care less, if I was in New York City or somewhere where there is a little excitement , then my thoughts are there. To be sober in Midland, Texas is a feet in itself. There is basically nothing to do , but work. There are parks with no water in them. There are trees around the homes in the main city , however outside the city limits there is brush and dirt. The Oil rigs are everywhere, and that gets old too. The smell of gas is ever present in my city and I am sure it is not good for people, but its money.

So staying sober on July 4th in my town is a test of ones sobriety.Every day in this city is a test of one's sobriety. The only places to go are to eat , bars, and AA. You could go to a Hosp…

Chris Raymer and AA

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When I met Chris R. , he was a speaker at La Hacienda treatment facility in Hunt, Texas. I was foggy when he spoke and in my Big Book , I have diagrams trying to follow him. He is controversial to some members of AA , although are we not all. He is straight to the point on the program of AA. This was taken from You Tube and if you like it search this one eyed bandit that discusses the "Issue Man", that for some reason is hard to find on the Internet , if not impossible. He talks of the "Issue man " as our spiritual malady and for some reason, not much is found on the Internet on this speech. I will try once more to find his discussion of this. Enjoy listening to this program of Chris R. He is a sircuit speaker and pretty upfront about his passion for recovery and people.

Male , Female Relationships in AA- Are they Possible

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I went and picked up my four year chip last night with my friend, I met in AA. She was beautiful and I helped her out with a place to stay for a couple of nights. She needed to get away from her home and figure out something, what she needs, I am not sure, but I could not provide it for her. I knew I would fall for her when I first met her, and I did. Having her in my house made it difficult to not watn to hold her and cuddle with her. I tried nothing with this sperson , though, because I knew the feeling was not mutual. She liked me, for me, but she wants no relationship, damn I thought.

However, can one have a relationship with another in AA.? I would say this would be difficult , and near impossible. You both may have physical attraction going on, then possibly sex. The bottom line is two people in the program are not the ideal mates to marry. That is of course my opinion again, and a lot of flirting goes on in AA. It's obvious in almost every meeting that has a young lady in th…