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Checked out Of Rehab

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I checked out of Rehab for Xanax and Adderall on Monday as I could not go through this 30 day program. I got off all my medication but it was too fast of a withdrawal. My ears were ringing very bad in this loud facility and I went home because I needed something for my Panic which was over whelming to me, as a cloud of dust was a fog in my eyes. I went to my regular MD on Monday and he prescribed heart medication and Prozac for me to calm down and this has helped more than anything. I am finally off every pill except for 2 mg. of Xanax in which I put myself on compared to the 6 mg. I was taking for over 8 years. I do not drink anything alcoholic , so I am not at all concerned about any type of relapse, as this tr
eatment program was for alcoholics and drug users that have no experience with the 12 steps of AA. I have over eight years of sobriety and I took this medication as prescribed by a psychiatrist. Therefor I was ask many times why I was getting off Xanax, and I was told by two …

Going Into Treatment

It's hard going into treatment for prescription drgs. I am not fucked up on whiskey or on illegal drugs. I am just me on medication that is addictive and I need off of them. I am about to go and take care of the medications or they will take care of me...ANyone that reads this , please be aware of the medications your doctor gives you if sober. I was a fool and thought I could get off very easily but I also knew that in the long term it would be difficult. My doctor would of kept me on these meds for my entire life he said. However , beware of some doctors cause they could mean well, just they fuck up. Have a good day. See you in 30 days. Chris

Treatment Center Bound For Prescription Medication Addiction

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I have tried to get off Xanax and Adeerall for the last few weeks and I can't seem to get over the withdrawals. I wil check myself into a local alcoholism and drug addiction Treatment Center on Tuesday. I am not looking forward to another Treatment Center, but I want off these medication for a long time now. I am sober still and even thought what about drining before I go in, and I have decided that tat would be stupid. This is the first time I ever went into a treatment center for drugs that were prescribed for me. No, i took the dosage as told but the dosage is high and I want my life completly clean, regardless of the outcome of treatment. I am going to hold my head up high and go through the motions for 30 days and be grateful that I can even afford to go and get help.I knew early on that these pills could be a problem , but my Psychiatrist insist that I must be on them the rest of my life. I find that incredibly wrong, as I have read and studied the medication I take and it i…

Doctors are Very Busy in Sobriety

Well, I have tapered off a couple of meds and I tried to call my psychiatrist to only find out he has left town. Lets say it appears this way, no answer on the phones, went by his office and lights were out and door was locked. Crazy shit I thought, so I got a hold of my Therapist and asked him, since he suggested this fellow, and he knew nothing about where this Psychiatrist went. So , now I guess I will just deal with this through a medical Doctor of mine who is Chinese. He is a good guy but he is very fast in talking and I will have to slow him down and make sure he understands what I am trying to accomplish. Each Doctor wants to do things their way, and these drugs are very strong that I am getting off of. So a bit frustrating today as I search for more answers, like a possible treatment center may be the only answer, staying sober through all this is not hard but I have been going to meetings every time I can every day. I don't know if the meetings help at times, but they kee…

No More Medication for Panic

I take Xanax and Adderall for panic attacks but I have recently squired two Dr.'s to help me wean off these medications. These are addictive meds and should not be taken for long periods of time like I have taken them. My former Doctor said I could take them forever, however I noticed that they were losing their kick. I sought out help and as of Monday have started getting off these pills one by one. I don't know what to expect except the worse, but I don't feel that bad so I might be wrong. I took these because I could not stand the panic when I got out of treatment 8 years ago. My Doctor assured me that there would be no complications, so beware of what your Doctor may tell you when prescribing medication. The withdrawals can be very bad, if not done right like I am with a counselor and a different psychiatrist. I should be totally off in eight weeks.This will be a relief to me as I knew they were addictive but followed my Doctors advise and took these anyway.When your s…

Seek Help When it All Gets Too Much

Recently with not flying because of fear and losing another job. I have decided to get off the medications which can be addicting for anxiety. This is a feat in which I am going to have to accomplish because the pills just do not work. Sure I could take more of them and all would be fine for a while, but that is addiction, and I don't want to go further into my addiction so I have decided to get off Xanax and work through my problems with a LPC couselor and a new Psychiatrist, starting Monday. This will not be easy , as the panic will get worse but hopefully if I understand why I have panic attacks in the first place, that I will learn how to control them, without drugs. This is going to be a long term situation and since I am sober it should not be a s bad as when I was drinking and trying to get off medicine. Its a start in a new direction for Chris and a much needed one. Id rather fear and shake then have to take medicine every day. I am taking a large step in my mind and I hav…

Am I A Failure in Life?

SO many things have backfired in my life. I am a alcoholic recovering and a former drug addict. Is that all I am? That does not look god on a resume. I am good man and I push forward in bad times, but I have to ask myself what am I really good at? We all have setbacks in life and maybe my recent flying routine is my setback. I lost another job , so that means Ill have to start all over . Sometimes this is too damn much. It is not that I am going to drink again, I don't have another drunk in me. I just get confused as to where to start off again to get my life in order. Here is a 53 year old man who cannot hold on to a job , but he can stay off the liquor, so I guess that is one thing in my favor. Very confused as to what to do next. A part of me just wants to get in my car and travel to the beach and get away. However when I get there what do I do? I can't run from myself but I would like to. I have reached a low point in my life right now. I hope all who read this will not be…