Negativity and Living Life Sober

That thing is this:

 

Not all things that people may say or think are really about you.

 

If someone is pretty much always negative about what other people do or
someone sometimes make personal attacks and let the destructive words flow
then - when such things are aimed at you - remember that it isn't always about
you.

 

Such words or negative habits can be a way for that person to release pent up
anger, frustration or jealousy about something in his or her own life. 

 

Or a way to reinforce that his or her viewpoint or belief is the right one. 

 

Or he or she may have a habit of getting others involved emotionally - baiting
them - to build a negative spiral, an argument or fight to get attention. 

 

It's about him or her. Not about something you did or want to do. 

 

You may just have been in the wrong place at the wrong time.

 

I have found that it can have a calming effect to remember this. And to remember
that the other person is still human and might be having a bad day, month,
marriage or job.

 

This doesn't mean that all criticism you may get is about the other person. Think
about what people tell you and ask yourself if there is something in what they say
that you can take to heart and perhaps work on.

 

Just don't make the mistake of thinking that all criticism or verbal attacks you get
is always about you. That will only tear you and your days apart and create
misery in your life. Taken from a positive email I got today. Chris