Sober The Tough Times

I have not written for a while now and I guess things were going to good. I have lost my job with 2 years behind my belt. Was I being unreasonable , I don't think so. I was up for a pay raise and the company wanted me to go into Production Printing . I had no problem with moving up but not with the salary they were paying me or not willing to pay me. The company found a minute issue with my job performance and decided I did not deserve a raise this year. I informed them through email I did in fact deserve a raise and I was professional in asking for this raise. Anyway I am now a official Uber driver in Midland, Texas with hardly any rides this week.

Staying sober through all this has been a challenge but the obsession to drink has been taken away for many years now, In fact I have seven years sobriety , so going out and getting drunk was not an option this time. I got on my high horse and stated selling on eBay and making quite a bit of money drop-shipping products form other retail outlets, until eBay caught on and put a hold on my account, for drop-shipping, I worked hard on this website listing more than 300 items to sell and then a complete stop by eBay and I was not in violation of anything wrong. They wanted me to verify who I was and where I got my products from. I told them the truth and sent the required documents then they wanted them again. I said Hell no, I am not going to provide any more information as I already have done this twice. I can't figure eBay out I was making about 4000 per week in net income from doing this and it was a headache, but God must have other things in mind for me.

Living life on life's terms is a hard thing to do at times, but God has brought me through many difficult times and I am sending out Resumes to everyone. In Midland , Texas it was booming with oil prices in the 80 to 100 a barrel prices but now that it is down to 4-0 dollars its dead out here. The bust has set in and the jobs are not there like they were a year ago. Like I said I am writing this journal so I can look back at my life as it progressess. It would appear that I am degressing at this point in my life, but I am not.

It is called change, and God knows I have changed for the better and he will choose what is best for me next. It is the waiting game that kind of throws me off. You see I am wanting results now, and I am working at anything I can to lessen the burden of having to borrow from anyone to pay my bills right now. I have sources that are willing to help me, and I am putting them off the best I can because I can make it. I might have to borrow from someone to get through this stage but not for long and the good thing about being sober, is the trust factor that people have with me now. In the past no one would of been willing to help me out in the situation I am in now. So staying off of drugs and drinking does pqay off in more than a few ways for me.

God , I hope whoever reads this realize I am not perfect in any way. I am just sober trying to live by God's will not mine, but I do have to put things into action as I am doing. I don't sit around watching Television or anything like that. I am not depressed as I know something better is headed my way, cause that has been the case through seven years of believeing in a higher power , which is God whom love you and me, and ask for his help in our time of needs. God Bless..Christopher

Staying Sober Through The Day

Work seems to help me and keeping my attitude towards God , and prayer keeps my mind offf of the drink thing. During the day I listen to music while I drive to different accounts around the area I live. I enjoy my music and my car, so most of the time I am occupied by work and driving during the day. I have been known to do a little bit of gambling online when I am not working a full day and I don't think this is positive for anyone. Like , I said from the beginning I am only human and I write this blog to keep track of my progress through the years of sobriety.
I attend AA meetings twice a week and sometimes more and sometimes not at all. I do find a spiritual connection when I go and I am glad when I go . The problem during the week is when I get home from a long day, I cook and feed and play with my Labrador and then relax playing my music and eat and then go to bed. Its been a good habit , yet sometimes a break in my habits are good also.I don't usually break my haits of prayer in the morning or in the day then evening. This has become a ritual of mine daily and seems to also keep myself sane and sober at the same time. 
I think the worst part of sobriety is to have idle hands where you don't have anything to do but search the web and just see whats going on. It can be depressing and it can be enlightening. For me, I do a little of both each day.
I have seven years of sobriety in a few days and it seems long yet it was short. The growing up I have done is remarkable thanks be to God. I attribute my sobriety to the spiritual side of the AA program and to the many friends I have in AA. The Big Book also has been a great way for me to understand myself as well. I hope this helps other people in their trek for staying sober as we all live different lives and situations. I still have money issues even with a good paying job, that is my fault but they are slowly getting better by the month as I pay down bills. Nobody said being sober and a good citizen of the world is easy but it can be if you let it be..Chris

Fear of The Unknown and Sobriety

Driven by a thousand forms of  fears we drank to rid ourselves of these fears. Facing fear head on is like facing the Devil and in fact fear is evil. If you think about it, the most fearful things we have today is the not knowing sensation. Not knowing if Jade Helm 15 is an exercise or just a military over run of our country is fear. This is big fear, this is evil fear.

If you think about it this whole fear factor with the military exercise is put in place by our own government. Evil is not stupid, they knew web sites would go up and fear would overcome some people into thinking the odd things they write for us to read on the internet. Mainstream TV is just now getting involved into this fear of ourselves, and it is growing. It is not the time to drink and say , Oh man might as well, the world is coming to an end. That is giving into fear and that is exactly what the Devil  wants is for us to give in to fear of an invasion. Personally , I think this is a show and an act of stupidity of our government to see how frightened they can get people, to run to the hills type of thing.

For those of us that believe in God we fear nothing, not even a government that does not acknowledge our pledge of allegiance, as I was trying to remember this the other day. It is a shame that so many Veterans have to be look at this as an invasion but I can understand where they think. They fought for our country and I still believe in our military . The military has orders and they will go through with them, but fear not any blood shed during this exercise, because I don't believe there is enough American soldiers that would shoot their own people. If provoked by some activist this could be a different story , and that I can see happen with all the mis-information being passed along the internet. How was this provoked by our US Army Generals in releasing documents and statements of their planned activity in our country. Did we really need to know this, as they do these exercises daily across the country., yes to promote fear so we should fear our Federal government.Why? Who really knows but of course there is changes happening in our own country.

So say your prayers for our soldiers and pray for the President and God Bless him for he may not know what is wrong and what is right.Fear starts with the high command and then ripples down to the people in ways where technology goes around the world in seconds through pages like this one.

I am for the Federal government having our soldiers here on US land, they are not at risk here, therefor their lives will be spared and this is what this is all about . Saving lives and making our soldiers stronger in battle The fear factor I could do without but thanks to limited coverage and our resources on the web we get several opinions that make seance to us and we believe someof them..Go sober and tell a service man you love him or her for their work..DO not bow down to fear though...God Bless...

Hostile Sober Texans

The heading is misleading in the fact that Jade Helm 15 has declared that Texas is hostile on thier map for exercises in the Texas area this summer. Is this something to worry about? Supposedly not, because they are our American troops in these war games and they are our children, aunts and uncles that make up the USA Army and special forces. For a person getting sober though this can mean a time of great confusion. With all the conspiracy theories out on the internet about what is really going on with our government it could frighten the most highly decorated veteran.

To tear away from this army exercise I have to say this is the best time for a person to get sober and keep his feet on the ground and not make any hasty thoughts control your actions. I think the fear I have with this Jade Helm 15 is that some crazy local militia person goes crazy and pop shots one of our soldiers out of fear and all hell breaks loose. That is the fear I have about this Jade Helm training. I wish they would just call it off , so we can live our lives like we have. There has been too much abrogation in the media and on the internet as a full blown war against ourselves. However right the websites may or may not be, it is confusing to the general public as to whom to believe.

I live for God and I am a Christian and no one will change this. No one!!!I have stayed sober because of my belief in God and my Christian ways. I ask my fellow friends to remember who really runs our country and that is one nation under God..Therefor we have no fear to fear. Remeber the army is on our side even if given orders to disrupt our peace and freedom , I don't think the USA forces woudl implament a plan to invade our home towns. I do believe this has been blown out of proportion and the conspiracy theories are not too far off their intentions, but we are talking about US forces, not Russian or any other country practicing on our soil.

STay sober and just be aware of yourself and how you feel. Let someone know if you have concerns about living life sober. A sponsor is what this is called in AA. Do not go out and buy a gun because of this army exercise, that would be stupid. Trouble enacts trouble and fears run rapid amongst those whom do not believe that God will take care of all of us in the end..

The Changing Sober Times In April 2015

Every day is a new day, we have to accept things we do not want to accept at times. Changes in and around us, affect us and we have to let go. If not , we get caught up in the hoop of poor me syndrome!! I , personally have been having the blues a bit lately, maybe because my birthday just past and i am now 52 and the world is moving strangely in a direction not familiar with most people.

 I live in Midland, Texas and you know about the Walmarts that have been closing in and sround the Midland, Texas area and other areas of the country. It is none of my business what the reason is and it does seem a little bit unreal, with all the conspiracy theories surrounding this and the military exercises that are taking place just around the corner from this city and possibly in the city.

We live one day at a time, and if we stay close to God miracles will happen just like staying sober. There is nothing to fear but fear itself!!! If you have a reason to be fearful it is normal, in a since. However to stress out and wonder about the future is not a correct assessment of what sober humans do. We are just a drink away from knocking ourselves into oblivion and possible death. The disease of Alcoholism is a punishment we all have lived with and yet if you are like me, it has been a wonderful enlightening way of life.

Yes, it is different to stay sober during times where we have no control. I have to speak for myself, I want control even being sober at times and yet I have to re- learn that I have no control over people, places and events. I believe in a loving God and no one can take that from me. No one will take this from me!!I pray for good health and for my family and friends and I have done this for over seven years of sobriety. May 2015 will be my seventh year without any substance to alter my mind. Therfor this is a milestone I have not ever past before.

I have grown up as a man and learned new ways of living without close codependency upon my family and learned to pay my bills on time and keep healthy by visiting a Dr. when needed. What else can a person do but hit AA meetings when you feel the need or at least for me it is about twice a week if not more at times when I am a little bit out of whack with the universe. I get a little bit paranoid some days , and then I have to remember that God is with me and he understands why I am who I am..I pray every single hour at times even while I drive during work and this helps me in a way that only a true recovered Alcoholic can understand or some religious person that believes in a spirit that is bigger then him or her. That is one point I have to remember is God is Huge!!!He is spirit , He is in me, He is my father.He either is everything or nothing , it says in the Big book. He is everything to me. 

My baby Lab watching me eat in the kitchen!!!

I have to know that I am OK with me!!In writing about these things I am OK with whom I am and have become. I am only a man living in a society that is messed up and I let God carry me at times to point A to connect with point B , because I do not have the will at times. It's easy to forget God is in our lives, with so much crap in this world. However I have learned to take a meditation break and just lay down on the couch and talk with God and ask questions to him for 30 minutes, and I sem to be good to move on day by day!!God Bless The USA....Christopher...

New Year 2015 And Sober Ice Storms

It is about to be the new year 2015, Wow, how could it be!! I never really partied with anyone on New Years, I was always at home drinking and smoking. I didn't want to get a DWI or anything.I was a smart drinker in some ways, and that was one of them. If I knew I was going to drink more than one beer, I stayed at home..There was a DWI I got when I was a kid at 17 and that reflected back to what not to do. Driving and drinking do not mix with me. I could drive better is what  I thought, and to this day I still think that I drove better when I had a few beers, but those days are long gone.

In Midland, we are having a Ice storm of sorts. The roads are closed and no traffic is in sight. It is in the teens in temperature, and I am stuck at home with my dog. I am still working though. I have training on different machines always, so I get paid for being at home training. Not too bad of a deal. It is lunch time and I felt like writing a bit so here it is.

When you are cabin bound like I am now, it brings back some old memories of what I use to do. I am glad I do not drink anymore, but if not sober I sure would go and buy a 12 pack and sit here andd play my guitar with a Cig hanging out my mouth and slopping the beer down..My neighbors would probably call the police cause I like to play loud rock, and that would be no good, I might get a PI. SO I think since I have almost 6 years of sobriety that writing is the best bet and doing my work online is even better, I can keep my job..

There is always two sides to a coin and which side you chose will make your day..I chose today to keep on living sober and I have..Being homebound because of Ice on the roads is ok..I just have to be creative in what I do so I don't get bored.In this town I live in each day I must be creative even after work or I might go gambling , online or at the casino, and this is not good either. One habit to another..It seems like I get addicted to most anything I touch or do that gives me a rush..Do you feel this way? It could be almost anything that gets my adrenaline going...I call it idle hands syndrome, and I have it bad sometimes.

That is why I write this blog is for no other reason thatn to communicate with you and myself. It is more of a diary than anything else. I look over the years and see where I progressed and where I did not.I have come a long way since I was 45 and drinking, and nothing can stop me now..I hope this has helped someone out there, but I am selfish and if this does not help anyone, so be it..I have to grab some lunch and do some work so I will leave you with this. Do not drive and drink..Period...Christopher

Living Sober through The Holidays 2014

It's holiday season again as it is every year. Living sober through the holiday season is no different then the rest of the year!! Is there a litttle bit more stress? Yes , of course there is..Some of us use to egt around out old school buddies and drink the night away and smoke . However if you have made the leap into a new faith of sober living you may not of gotten together with your old budies and if you did you might of not got drunk this year.

I kknow I had to change the people places and things in my life to stay sober. Did you?
Quite possibly you do not have the same friends as you did in your drinking days as you do now..I do not have many friends that are still living , so it's not too unusual to spend time alone reading books and collecting my comics as I do this for a hobby.

Christopher and Son 2014

We all have our demons but if you believe in Christ our Lord he will rid these demons out and let you have a spiritually based holiday with no interruptions. Mine has been peaceful, with my family and the few friends I have in AA..Today is 12/30.2014 and I am off Thursday till Monday of this week, and that makes it nice to be able to sleep in , so to speak. Have you found it hard to sleep in? I have, really sleep in means about an hour more than 7 am for me. I have a schedule even on my off days to get things done at the house. God has made it possible for me to have chores to do to occupy my time, and then I have started reading more often than not books.

Living sober in 2014 was not bad, it had it's up and downs but mostly ups. I made several mistakes in life and what I did and said. I make no resolution when the new year starts, I just break them anyway..Have you really kept your New Years resolutions, or are they just conversation things to talk to friends about and laugh about?

Remeber , this is just a diary of my life and not to be taken too seriously because I do not take life to seriously or I would go nuts. I bought a new 2015 vehicle for work and home, and still do not know if it was stupid or not. It is not a Corvette , but it is what I needed for work and home life, so It is just the car I needed. God bless you all whom read this and take it One Day at a Time..Christopher...