God is a Driving Force in My Sobriety

What drives us to change and do better or worse. There is a power greater than myself in that drives my spirit up or down. Possibly the downward spiral of myself is from my own actions. I may not include God in everything that I do, while trying to keep in touch with God I lose touch. I have a spiritual connection with God and I have, to be honest, that I use this sometimes when things are rough and not when life is moving forward in my sobriety and just plain living. Living without a connection to God is self- imposed and it can be very easy to start playing God when you forget that you are not God. People say to me at times, have a Blessed Day! I think these people are more spiritual than I am because it comes so natural for these individuals to say this. I also find that when I am told this remark that I feel better about my day. I try to copy these people and say ,:Have a blessed Day", as I know what it feels to have a clerk at a convenience store say this to me, and when it feels good it must be good.

When it is right and feels good then it must be God working in my life. If I do something wrong and I question what I might be doing then I must be disobeying the spirit of God that resides in me. To stay sober one must believe in God to keep going through the day. I have to do this and I practice praying to my friend, " God" on an hourly basis. No one said this God thing would be easy , but at times it really can be to get yourself through the next hurdle of life. Have a great day Chris Hyer

The Big Book and Sobriety

I don't make it a habit to read the Big Book of AA. I do read it in the mornings or evenings where I get bored. I usually see myself in some fashion or another in this book. This could be a present or past reflection on whom I have become as a sober individual. When reading the Big Book of AA , I find passages that are out of date. The meaning of some of the words can be quite confusing to me, so I look some of them up in a dictionary, and the word makes perfect sense to the context in which it is written. I find that reading the pages in the back of the book can be enlightening to myself, as when I go to AA meetings these back chapters are ignored.Most of the AA meetings are focused on the 12 steps of the book in the first 100 or so pages. This is good information and if lived with a spiritual connection do work for the alcoholic who is trying to understand what this whole book and program is about.

I also read the Bible on a daily basis and Rick Warren a Pastor out of California has a book called "The Spirit Driven Life", I believe that is the name of it. This book helps me to understand what God wants for me out of my relationship with him. I was hesitant to read a Pastor book , because of the church , but he has made the words make good sense to me in what my program is all about and that is a spiritual journey into God's life and how to please my God .

Years ago I could not care a less what these two books have to say. In sobriety, you need to believe in a spiritual life bigger than yourself  which can help you get over the first step in AA. How you do this can be confusing but in reality it just means you will give up drinking and or using for a power greater than yourself , the obsession will leave once you believe in this attitude. This sometimes will happen fast and other times it will be slow, I think it is how you believe in a power greater than you as to how fast this approach will transform your brain.The disease of alcoholics is really unfounded, it is a mental instability that causes most of us to drink until we pass out or otherwise get to the point in which we are comfortably numb. To stay sober  means that we will neglect alcohol and drugs and move on through the day and be as normal people do such as work and help others help themselves.

Helping others is key to living a spiritual life, but we first must focus on helping yourself get through the pain of so many years of self-abuse. This takes time and to each individual, this time also can be short to long term. You get what you put into your mind from reading and going to AA meetings and the people that you let yourself be around. I am amazed at the sober ones that have a boyfriend or girlfriend that still drinks and they are trying to stay in this sick relationship. Drinking is fine for those who do not abuse it. So I am not talking about the casual drinker , but the alcoholic who has to live with one whom is alcoholic , this must be a hard situation to cope with. I would have to get away from this person , or I could not of stayed sober for very long.

Well, it is Sunday 8/21/2016 amd I am still employed and paying bills, I go to the grocery store and run errands and do my paper work for work. I am a functioning recovered alcoholic. In the past I put off these things or they would not get done any of them. I seee my progression through these pages in my blog. I also see it and hear it from people in my AA program that say I have come a long way. That is pleasing but in reality I have a little more than 8 years of sobriety with about 20-30 years of drinking, and I am very glad that I do not crave anything like alcohol to make it through the day. I get bored and that just means I need to get busy. I call this idle hands syndrome. You have to be careful and not isolate yourself from the world and I know this at it's best. Have a great day and to feel God is to get knowledge about the spirit of God and I challenge you and myself to know more each day of our creator , so you can live one day at a time and live a whole new outlook on life. God Bles Christopher Hyer

Saturday and Staying Sober

Saturday in the years of my drinking were days to re0couperate from Friday night highs and drinking. I would not wake up until noon or later and then go get food as I was hungry in which woke me up. It would be close to three or four in the afternoon before my head kicked in and I was truly awake. I am not sure how your Saturday was but for me it was quite and sleepy most of the day. Of course, I was preparing for Saturday night and what I was going to drink or smoke. If I was out of weed, I started to make phone calls to get some for the rest of the week. It was like a totally different lifestyle than it is now.
Eight years later in my present tense, I wake up about six AM and try to sleep in till 7 AM and then I let my puppy out the backdoor and let her do her stuff and fix breakfast and drink juice. That is my usual Saturday now. After breakfast, I look at my work phone to see if I have calls for the day I need to take care of , and then get ready to work them or if I don't I get ready for AA as I have a meeting at 10 AM I like to go to in Midland, Texas. I sometimes go grocery shopping in the morning but that habit has changed, and sometimes I just go and buy a few things cause I really just but what I can eat for a few days , but I buy a lot of sparling water. I like Swepps Sparkling water it is my beer for the day , and I like the fizz and taste of this drink. I have progressed to Gatorade also , for some odd reason, I like the taste.

So you now see the change of when I was using alcohol and drugs and to the now when I do not use these things. I really did not know the difference until I started writing this down on this blog. Maybe it is good to have a blog and write how your past was and what you are like now. It sure makes a difference in how far one has come to be sober and living with God. Yes, there is that God word again, he and I are best of friends on a daily basis. I have to have a higher power with me at all times. Call me co-dependent..lol However, it seems to work for me to have gone through these changes and end up not hung over and up and early like I am now. What a miracle once I read over what I just wrote. If you want what I have just take a few steps from AA and work them and then you become a better more productive human being, and you might help change someones life . I write this for me to loook back on and it is interesting to note that I have about 900 people that read this blog a month. So people are interested in how I live I guess. I hope it helps someone. Have a good Saturday, and God Bless. Christopher Hyer.

Belief In a Higher Power For Social Sobriety

God, is a big spiritual relief for me. There are those that do not understand God, and I think that is God's intentions. He wants us to believe in a higher power that is stronger than yourself, therefore the word , God. I have for the last eight years have had a strong belief in God working wonders of miracles in my life. Like my previous post about Panic, God knows that I could have a problem with addiction with the medications but he knows what is up with my life at all times. So be it. I wake up in the early morning about 5 AM and begin to pray for the new day everyday, and this last during work and after work up until the evening. See , in my opinion, God wants to know how you feel about him and yourself on a daily basis. He wants us to rejoice in knowing him on a personal basis. Whether you want to call it a friendship, in which God is my best friend, or spirituality , God works so many miracles in my daily life, that I know no other person or thing could do for me. I am almost 9 years sober now, and it is the miracle of AA and my God spirituality that gets me through the good times and the rough times. This is just me, there are those of you who do not believe in God. I suggest you go outside and look at a leaf and wonder about the veins in which the leaf grows and how intricate the lines are, perfect. I don't think we are a mistake in this world, and yet to believe in something one cannot see is hard to explain until you have had situations that are miracles that only would be happen chance of going on in your life. For me , and my belief , I think every time something goes wrong a right seems to happen . It seems to follow a lesson from God that I either have done something he is not particular lily happy with and then I do something to help someone and I get this feeling that is good and wholesome. We all know when we sin. No one needs to tell us when we do something immoral or sinful. We all sin, but what I think God wants us to do is show to him and tell him we were wrong. It takes a spiritually guided look on life to do this particular action.

In the Big Book of AA there is a part that says either God is or he is not , what is your choice to be? I want to be on a winning team and God to me is a happy spirit and I am here for his entertainment, but he wants us all to succeed, maybe not get rich or have a Corvette, but whatever we can accomplish in our daily lives and give back to those who may not have what we have is the true trick to this God outlook. The feeling of helping a stranger out with groceries or helping a person with the door, is morally right and it shows we generally care about one another. That makes my God smile and it makes me smile when I know I have done something in my life that I make no money but provide just a little bit of help to those in need.

Of course, there are those who cut us off in traffic and we swear at them or shoot the finger, but if you are where I am at in my program you let it go and say:God Bles Them" I was taught that by a friend that has passed away. Everytime, something rude was done to this friend of mine he would say "God Bless Them "out loud. I use to really trip out to this , but it is like cussing but your not. Your asking for God's help in dealing with this person and your also praying that this person has a better day. It takes a strong person to admit a higher power such as God can help you. However, once you take a hold of prayer and really believe in God you will notice changes in your lifestyle, and they are good. This is a good reason to stay sober, to have a better relationship with God and yourself. It is selfish in a way but most who drink are very selfish people, and it stays with us . I really feel a need to write more on God, and I will throughout my life on this blog . As I said this is a journal for myself and you are welcome to read it. I am 53 now and plan to keep writing on this blog until the end of my time. God Bless Chris Hyer

Sobriety and Panic

I don't write very consistently but when I get a thought I usually have to write about it. Panic attacks are common in most people,, or anxiety. The higher the anxiety the more likely you will have a panic attack. I have had these off and on for all my life. Sobriety does not cause panic but an alcoholic drink surely calms panic down and anxiety,.So what do you do? I give it up to God plus I take medication for Panic attacks and prevention. There are a lot of people that would not agree with this action. When I first sobered up eight years ago, I was a full-blown agoraphobic, I would not leave the house or I would have massive panic attacks.This was horrible, I had this before I even started drinking at a very young age and I have seen hypnotherapist, and taken CBT therapy and many different medications over the years. You may be having the same issue as I have and are looking for answers and I really don't have them. You might take a chance and take medication , I would not take it lightly, however.

Panic medication can be addictive and I just might be addicted to my medication. I do know I take it as directed by a psychiatrist and my sponsor knows about this and God is aware of what I do. I do not think that it is a good idea, but there is no cure for anxiety that rages and ruins your life. I have sought after a cure for many years and the same old therapy is out there that does not work for me. I just thought I would throw this Panic idea out at you people and hopefully get some feedback. Thank You Chris Hyer