Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Everything happens, When nothing seems Possible Sober

Well, I have had a great weekend. I started off with getting hired for a job that requires a lot of traveling and this is fine. Followed by a girlfriend of mine who came back into my life and wanted to go out Friday night. When things look bleak in sobriety, beware because something big is probably about to happen for the good. I have been a little depressed over the last few weeks , and I still kept my head up high knowing that something good would become from all the resumes I have put out and staying busy with my program and AA. It never fails as God comes into my life daily even though I feel he has left me, and brings me big surprises. That is how sobreity works, not expecting anything really and when your down keep busy helping others and it will come back to help you. That is how eight years of living has been for me. I forget at times this rule of thumb. God never forgets me however, he just keeps me outside of myself and I get loaded up with ideas of what I can do to make life better for myself and my friends.

Don't give in or give up when you are sober and this is an easy thing to do when alll in life is not where you want to be at. In time God will listen and change your direction and guide you in a way that might not be your way but his way of getting you out of situations that use to baffle us. We use to drink when we could not find an answer or drink because we found an answer. However drinking did us no long term good, in the short term drinking let us forget the past, and future of our problems. Then you wake up and wonder why you feel like shit and the same roller coaster ride begins again and again. I can honestly say I don't miss that about drinking. Hope you have a good day. Chri

Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Music and The Sober Musician

I am a musician and record my work in my home. I am fortunate enough to have almost every instrument I could need in order to play the music I like. My taste in music is mostly hardcore rock to mellow ballads. I am eight years sober and I remember when I stated playing
again after I got sober, and nothing came to my mind to play. Over the years my mind has opened up and I just play what I enjoy hearing and sometimes it actually sounds pretty decent. I am not a professional musician , however I have played in bands most of my life for fun and enjoyment. I prefer not to play in a band right now because I don't need to get wired up in a bar and start drinking and playing. It is tempting to do this but , my sobriety is not worth the headaches and pain of starting to drink for fun again. I would be back on the roller coaster of drinking every day. The big book of AA talks about the casual drinker and the thoughts of one day being able to drink like normal people, but I am far past normal.lol

I think it is good therapy to play music , even if you suck. The enjoyment of making a sound and enhancing this sound can bring a smile to your face. It does this for me, and even though I have to force myself at times to go into the recording studio at home and get the electric guitars out of their cases and hook them up and plug the computers up to perform and make adjustments to the sounds ,. It is a work in progress and a few of my friends really enjoy my tunes. When I play I go somewhere else in my head and I don't think much about anything but my sounds. So it is calming effect for a person to just set down and play these tunes and enjoy what he hears. I highly suggest you get an instrument you might like and learn to play. It is great for your health and mental well being. Have a great day Chris

Sunday, April 9, 2017

"The Shack" a Book about a conception of God

I have been reading a book called , "The Shack", I am not an avid reader but a member of AA was talking on night about the different conceptions of God that we all have. This book and movie is right on target with a person's conception of God and it is really an enjoyment to read. The movie has already come out and I was able to see this movie and it seemed to follow the book pretty well. I highly suggest this to those who have a problem with AA and the God conception in our lives. Yes, I know the book is fiction but in reality it could be the truth. It is a joyful book about a tragedy
that has happened to this man and his family, but ends on a good note. To stay sober means one has to believe in a power greater than himself. This is proven over and over in AA meetings and in my personal life. Sometimes we might feel that God has failed us, but if you look deeper , he may be teaching us a lesson that makes us better human beings. For those who do not believe in a God , if you stick around AA and hear the miracles of the different people speaking , you will have to believe in something that is more powerful than you are. Kepp your mind open and your heart full of love, and help others that may be trying to recover just like yourself. To stay outside of yourself can be hard to do , but once you do this activity , you will feel the goodness that becomes over your spirit and body.

I am not expert in AA and yes I have my problems in life, but they are part of living in a world full of obstacles that can set you apart from the creator. I am guilty of so many things in my life but I ask for forgiveness and I receive this at times. We all have reality in which we have to live in , and to isolate ourselves is a dangerous thing to do, but very easy to get into the habit of isolation. Try to do the things you want to do that wil help someone else and this isolation will go away for a while. I am guilty of this isolation in this smal town I live in as I say well ther is nothing to do. However there is plenty to do at my home and with other people that might make a difference in your life. Have a good Week. Chris

Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Good Things About being Sober

Monday I went to San Antonio with my AA sponsor to a meeting in which my sponsor Eddie was to speech
. We had a good time talking on the trip down there and then we hit the meeting in town and he got a standing ovation. Very proud of him and he was proud that I went with him on the 5 hour trip. On the way back on Tuesday to Midland I was called for a second interview with a company I have been trying to get on with in employment. I returned home and this was a phone interview and I had passed my electronics test and personality test , so I was pretty happy. This is a miracle from god that we talk about in AA , and how God works in our lives when we least expect it. Anyway I was invited to my last interview to be held on Thursday morning over the phone again with the hiring manager, so I would assume I am pretty well hired, but I won't know until Thursday.

Sobriety and giving back was was freely given to me is what this AA program is all about. Working the steps and getting out of self is a major part of staying sober as well. Taking your medication as directed is part of the program. Put all these together and you will have a healthy lifestyle working for one day at a time. I am living proof of the miracles and the confusion I bring to the table of a recovering alcoholic. I have fought the system and things in my life just did not work out, even when I thought I was in the right. God has blessed me , even in the hard times of my life as written in this blog with a better life when I let go and do something for others than myself. God Bless and have a good day. Chris

Sunday, April 2, 2017

Moving on with a Sober Life

Well, I have hit a few hurdles in my last few post on this blog. I am back on my medication, as it works and I can function. Be careful what others say to you and about your life. You are the only one living in your own body and you know what works and what does not. Alcohol does not seem to work in any one soul out there that can drink to oblivion. Treatment is a must for the first time alcoholic who suffers and it is usually a good thing for those who are not familiar with the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. If you drink and you are out of control, please seek help, and try to stick with meetings and work the 12 steps of AA as fast as you can in recovery. This will get you feeling better in the long run and will get you familiar with the steps in your life and how they will change your life. By the grace of God , I am still sober even after putting myself through hell, on getting off the medication I am taking, but I am taking it as prescribed and feel like it must be the correct medication as I feel normal now. We all have some emotional or depression in our lives when we sober up. There is a reason why we drank, and although drinking is a disease there are underlying reasons why we drank. Talk to a Doctor and find out these reasons or maybe working the 12 steps you will find a little part of yourself that you can work on to make you happier and not so gloom.

Panic runs deep into my family, my father has it and he still drinks and my son has it and he takes medication as I do for to control the panic. It is a mental disorder that I have and my son has, and it must run in the genes. I cannot control this as I have tried ever since I was a 16 year old boy. I drank alcohol because of my panic attacks, as it was a sedative and kept me calm. I was not a rowdy drunk but I drank on a daily basis so I could get out of my house and try to be normal. I had to come to terms with my Panic Disorder and realize that I needed outside help from a Doctor and I sought this help. Many people in AA frown upon what I am doing but let them frown as I need to socialize and be as normal as most people out there in the world and function . If you have panic disorder, please send me a note and tell me about it. I would appreciate this very much. Thank You Chris Hyer 4/2/2017

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Checked out Of Rehab

I checked out of Rehab for Xanax and Adderall on Monday as I could not go through this 30 day program. I got off all my medication but it was too fast of a withdrawal. My ears were ringing very bad in this loud facility and I went home because I needed something for my Panic which was over whelming to me, as a cloud of dust was a fog in my eyes. I went to my regular MD on Monday and he prescribed heart medication and Prozac for me to calm down and this has helped more than anything. I am finally off every pill except for 2 mg. of Xanax in which I put myself on compared to the 6 mg. I was taking for over 8 years. I do not drink anything alcoholic , so I am not at all concerned about any type of relapse, as this tr
eatment program was for alcoholics and drug users that have no experience with the 12 steps of AA. I have over eight years of sobriety and I took this medication as prescribed by a psychiatrist. Therefor I was ask many times why I was getting off Xanax, and I was told by two Doctors that I was taking too much. Inside , I kind of knew that 6 Mg. of Xanax was way too much , but i felt like the Dr. knew what he was talking about. Be careful about these Doctors that prescribe Xanax as it works very good with Panic attacks , but is very addictive in the long haul. I am feeling pretty good, going on a long walk with my puppy this early AM and I had breakfast and took the new medication with the blood pressure medication I have just gotten. I am taking this one day at a time, with the love of my family behind me, I will beat this . God bless Chris

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Going Into Treatment

It's hard going into treatment for prescription drgs. I am not fucked up on whiskey or on illegal drugs. I am just me on medication that is addictive and I need off of them. I am about to go and take care of the medications or they will take care of me...ANyone that reads this , please be aware of the medications your doctor gives you if sober. I was a fool and thought I could get off very easily but I also knew that in the long term it would be difficult. My doctor would of kept me on these meds for my entire life he said. However , beware of some doctors cause they could mean well, just they fuck up. Have a good day. See you in 30 days. Chris

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