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Gambling and Alcohol Addiction " They go hand in hand"

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I am perfect by no means. What I am going to point out to myself on here is that yes, I have addiction problems. I'm addicted to sex, gambling and was addicted to alcohol. I heard a speaker at my Treatment Center named Chris Raymer , and he goes on to say that we all have that little pleasure person inside us called the "Issue Man" The "Issue Man" Loves pleasure we get from drugs alcohol, sex, gambling anything that gives us a high. This part of our body craves our addiction and will tell us to get more of it. Controlling the :Issue Man " is near impossible for the recovering addict. However that is where the 12 steps come in to say , hey stop the insanity and let us get with the program; Chris. I do alright for a while then I fall back into gambling , I know the value of money, but I also know the rush I get from hitting a jackpot. They are almost the exact same except I don't get the same type of hangover with gambling as I did with alcohol. I do get…

Time and the Alcoholic

Time, when we are awake and have a holiday or a weekend day off for an alcoholic can be a little unusual. In Midland, Texas there is no lakes for miles or mountains for miles and really not much in entertainment except for  eating out, or going to a movie. I have done both for the last 8 years and I have to say it gets boring. I might just be relaxed and with nothing to do, I get a little confused.I don't think about drinking or smoking but I do wonder what the hell to do. I drive  at least 1500 miles a week with the company I am with and the last thing I want to do is go for a ride. I use to paint a little bit here and there but I found this boring in itself. I am alone most of the time I am off, I don't date anymore. I have not found anyone I would even consider dating at my age of 53 in this town. I have looked, believe me I am on every singles sight there is that is free and no one appeals to me. A few ladies do appeal to me, but I have these chat sessions and they get bor…

Sobriety and the Internet "huh"

Well, interesting enough, I started writing this blog about 7 years ago and I have about 400 readers monthly . So you are reading what was intended on being a personal journal abut my sobriety and living life. Thank you for finding an interest in this blog. I don't care if a thousand people read this a month, I am not making any money for it..Anyway, I had my AA Birthday night last week and 20 people turned out to listen to what I had to say. It really was a large crowd for my group as we are a small group of usually about 6- 10 people showing up to meetings. I was glad that there were people interested in what I had to say.
I wrote most of what I wanted to say down before going to the meeting as I was the only speaker. There was a fellow from the treatment center, called La Hacienda that was there, he was alright I guess. Treatment centers trip me out. They take all your money when you go into one and if you have no previous association with AA , it can really throw you for a loo…

Non-Drunk Memorial Day and Socially Sober

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It's been a while since I have written. I do this blog for my own journal anyway, so when I look back over the future, I can see how much I have grown or resisted growth. However you are welcome to review my blog post and make comments.

Its Sunday night in Midland, Texas and it is Memorial Day on Monday, in which we have so many Veterans that are young and old that have made the USA free with the work in our military. God bless them and hopefully we can bring home a few thousand more young people home with thier families. That is what life is about , is family living and not war. I think our political system seems to split this up especially during the election year. Let's bring our brothers and sisters home where they belong.

Staying sober today is no different than it was last week or eight years ago for me. I do stay sober for a reason. The main reason is I do not want to feel bad the next day. When drinking and smoking pot , at night usually , I was very happy and content …

I get Bored AT Times being Sober

AT times I get pretty bored in between work and at home. I like being home but , I have exhausted my old hobbies with music and art. I find that the time I kill now is laying on the couch and watching a movie with my eyes closed, cause I am tired. Funny thing is I use to do the same thing when I was drinking . Except now , I am not. I don't wake up with the room spinning and I don't feel bad. Maybe a little bit depressed and wondering if I should do something new with my living situation. Midland, Texas is a boring town. No Lakes or mountains to gaze at and the only place to go out at night is AA, a restaurant, or bar. Being single my choices are very limited, I use to look forward to going to work. Now this is getting boring. I have been to more AA meetings and I enjoy these, but while I work I can't really attend these and that would be a cruch in a way.

AA cannot rule my life just guide it. I would get bored from going to a meeting every hour on the hour or every day fo…

Happiness With Staying Sober Socially

I have been in a rut the last few weeks, and I think I might of found a way around my glum. I work on call 7 days a week and I was getting burned out from my job. My attitude was changing , I really was not caring about myself or the job. I think people call this burnout.

Well for me I started to think about smoking pot again and then I knew I was in trouble, so I went to an AA meeting as soon as I could. Noticed that I was not making AA much during the week cause of my burnout period. SO I changed this and then I realized I was doing the best job I could and to make it a little more fun than I have been . I wake up early at 5 AM to start work and usually home by 3PM and I was getting slack in this area. I realize AA is a big deal but I was too bored and tired to go to AA meetings lately . I was slowly sinking and realized that my job is not my life, but it has to be a part of my daily living if I want money.

SO change again, I am now making sure I put some fun into my work and that I…

Sobriety and Having a Dog?

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There is something to be said about having my Labrador Retriever as my friend and companion . I highly recommend getting an animal such as a dog that you can love when going through sobriety. The animal unconditionally loves you all the time. I have had Abbey my puppy for over threee years and she is always there for me . In the tough times I can hug her and even when I feel like loving her I can, she loves being loved. I am single so this puppy has been my girlfriend and friend in life. I treat her like a human and she loves me for it.

Someone to love and love you back is important in sobriety. I still have not found Mrs. right for me, so the dog just does fine in my case. She does not complain ever or get sad, or tell me any lies. Love her to the moon. I have been doing ok recently , my new job has its moments but I finally got off this weekend and decided to write in my journal. I will have eight years sobriety in May 21st of this month. That is a long time for me. However if your …