Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts

Sunday, July 7, 2013

One Day At a Time ; Sobriety

Taking my life one day at a time. I don't know how good I practice this. I do try to think ahead, because I have to line up my life a few days ahead of time. Taking "One Day at a time", is a difficult step for any of us. I have so much to look forward to in the future, even if right now, I don't see it. I am sober again today and this will be everyday as far as I know, and for today I will be sober. The craving for alcoholic beverages really does not thoroughly go away when I think about this. The ads on Television and going to convenience stores surely throw this shit at me. So , I salivate for about 5 seconds and then I am ok, so the obsession to buy this particular drink has been lifted. Enjoy Stevie Ray Vaughn below for a little "Superstitions"

There are still problems in my daily living and AA helps in taking care of this. I also put in my two cents of , "No I am not going to drink because of so and so. There are problems , but drinking just makes them go away for a short period of time. I know this from experience and I am sure you do too. So taking this one day at a time, or even one hour at a time is needed, for me to live a sober life .
I say the serenity prayer constantly, and obsessively at times. I am the typical recovering alcoholic that thinks I can take one drink and stop , but knowing that I will take another sometime soon is what keeps me away fo 4 plus years of sobriety. I am working the steps daily , and my 4th step is done,however I need to get my sponsor involved into this.

One thing I have slacked up on is how many meetings I go to, and I need to get back in this habit of going to more, it would seem, or appear to me. I damned these AA meetings enough. They really help when I need them and other times I wonder why the hell I go. If it keeps me sober then there is no contemplating them.So live "One Day at a time" and God Bless.     

Saturday, July 6, 2013

Saturday 07/06/2013 ---1 Timothy of the Bible

"May God our Father and Christ Jesus our Lord give you grace,mercy,and peace" Chapter 1 in Timothy in the bible. 

Wow, what a strong phrase we have been given. Paul in the bible was given control by the command of Jesus, "It is written to Timothy,my true child in the faith".....What a concept, to have the Lord Jesus Christ give one such an honor. To be loved by Jesus , so much that God had appoited Paul to spread the word of God and to trust and have faith in him to do his deed.

Christopherhyer 2013
Is that what we all seek in reality , is a commitment from others to understand that through faith and love that God has made us into human beings to carry on this message to other human beings. A twelve step for sure, I would imagine."Live a life of Faith " is what Paul says in Timothy and do not stray away into any false promises.

This would hold true for alcoholics," please oh lord help us keep the faith and do not let us go a stray with our own ides" and "Thy will be done" not mine. This would tend to be the message I received this morning.

I am selfish with God and my own delusions of what I should be doing. I am guilty of not loving God every moment I can get a chance. Maybe for today we pray a little more and have faith that a power greater than ourselves brings us out of misery and into happiness. We all deserve this happiness and joyfulness.  

Friday, July 5, 2013

God Grant Me!! Sobriety

In the mornings , I say prayers for the day to begin with and ask for guidance and courage to face the world. It has become habbit, and without prayer in the morning , I would not be complete for the day. It is so much of a habit that I even recite the Serenty prayer a few times to get me going. Do you do this?

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. Sucha strong prayer for living . The short prayer is good for everything in this world. You cannot change the things you can't. It is so true. Love for other animals and human beings seem to take place with the serenity prayer. I don't think about drinking in the morning, that obsession has been removed. I have days where I am not so up . This is true with all of us, though I have not had a bad day since being sober. No hangovers, no headaches, or alcohol on my breath to get off. There is so much to be thankful for this morning.

July 4th was a bit hard to take, yet I woke up this Friday with a different attitude, and feel good about myself. I can't change those things I cannot control. Maybe this is hard to swallow on occasion, so I just keep praying all day long. Have a beautiful day and God Bless...Chris

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Male , Female Relationships in AA- Are they Possible

I went and picked up my four year chip last night with my friend, I met in AA. She was beautiful and I helped her out with a place to stay for a couple of nights. She needed to get away from her home and figure out something, what she needs, I am not sure, but I could not provide it for her. I knew I would fall for her when I first met her, and I did. Having her in my house made it difficult to not watn to hold her and cuddle with her. I tried nothing with this sperson , though, because I knew the feeling was not mutual. She liked me, for me, but she wants no relationship, damn I thought.

Cocoa by Christopherhyer2013
However, can one have a relationship with another in AA.? I would say this would be difficult , and near impossible. You both may have physical attraction going on, then possibly sex. The bottom line is two people in the program are not the ideal mates to marry. That is of course my opinion again, and a lot of flirting goes on in AA. It's obvious in almost every meeting that has a young lady in the group, men are always hitting on her. I see this everywhere I go. This girl may be sick as hell, and yet men hit on her consistently, making AA even a hard place for this single women to be involved with. This needs to be addressed and taken care of from meeting to meeting.

Relationships are problems for us in AA and those of us that have drank a lot of years. It was a reason why we drank at times, and to deal with a spouse in the program of AA is true honesty. If you are honest with this women in A
A that you like and she can be that way back to you, then mutually you have made an agreement. This is a good deal, because if for some reason the relationship does not work out, you can still be friends. This is my case at hand. I had to let the young lady leave my place, because I told her of my intentions and how I felt, we spent the morning analizing this and she packed and wanted no relationship. That is ok with me , now and I did not hurt her and she did not hurt me. We were honest about our feelings and able to communicate our desires and our likes.

Living sober is what AA teaches you even if you are not trying to learn this, or is this God working in our lives? I would say a little bit of both. She escorted me to a meeting to receive my four year chip and I was honest when I spoke at AA last night about my past and present. This living sober is about being honest with yourself , and living through the spiritual aspect of God. It works, really works when you don't try to analize at like I tend to do . God bless and come back ....Happy 4th to those that will have the day off, and to those working . Christopher

Sunday, June 30, 2013

Living One Day At A Time

The thought of living one day at a time, is not a new one. It is done by not worrying about the next day as you can not predict if you will even be around this earth the next day. In reality we would guess that we will live to the next day. How are we suppose to plan for tomorrow then. I beleive you should plan ior have a plan of action for the following days and try to stick with it. Have realistic goals in mind. To say your not going to drink today is fine, about the next day , maybe your not sure? If you have a few months or days sober, it is possible this thought hits your head.

Taken at Ingram, Texas Christopherhyer2013
The best thing to do one hour at a time is pray for strength to not drink because of problems or issues you may have. Drinking just makes them go away for a while, and continued drinking will cause problems with issues that could of been taken care of the first day. I was guilty of this and would put off important things and let them build up until I was in trouble with finances of whatever.

 It is Sunday and this day the banks are closed and many bushiness are closed Living one day at a time , means to take it easy. there are only a few things that can be done as far as today is concerned. Take a extended vacation, if able to . This is a great way to get a breath of fresh air, and somewhere that is serene. We all need this type of stress reducer. I have been meditating lately and this has worked really good when I can't take a vacation.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

William James and Sobriety

William James was a was an American philosopher and psychologist who had trained as a physician. He lived in the late 1800s to 1910. He also was the first person to start a Psychology class in America. He is mentioned in Bill W.'s video I saw on an AA site on the Internet. Bill W. said after reading "The Varieties of Religious Experiences" by William James he had a spiritual awakening. He had no desire after this episode to take another drink.

Interested as I am about this subject, Alcoholism, I decided to buy this book and wow, it is over my head. William is a Philosopher that blows me away with his words in this book. It is over 400 pages on religious beliefs and material concerning religion as a whole and spiritual beliefs that manifest itself. It is hard reading to a guy like myself.

After doing some research and putting down this book. I find out how brilliant this man is, or was and how he added to oour society of AA and the world at large. These are a few quotes from him"Act as if  what you do makes a difference. It Does"

"Belief creates the actual fact"

"The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another"

"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing."

"The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook"

Powerful stuff, huh.....This fellow was very precise in this book, and the meaning of living is installed in this book, it would seem. The simplicity of his quotes are elegant and straight forward compared to his book, which is a back and forth pragmatic genius that eludes a reader.

Have a great day and check out the book if you can read this type of information, its very complex. God Bless. 06/26/2013

Thursday, June 20, 2013

The Spiritual Malady Inside Alcoholics

The days go by so fast that we have to slow ourselves down. As an alcoholic that is in recovery, I know too much about the ins and outs of a normal day. What is normal? No one can define this except to live life on a daily basis, and abide by all laws. The laws of society and your place in this world must be ideal for one to live. The spiritual malady exists in each and every person on this earth. When one has an addiction, the spiritual malady can go insane inside of a person whom is alcoholic. I will explain this further in this book. We, as a society shun alcoholics that are on the street pushing baskets from one place to another. They are searching for their soul and drinking for these few unfortunates is a way of living. The spiritual malady inside these people is the same as most recovering alcoholics. The difference is controlling this through a spiritual connection to a higher power, or God. This sounds very easy to the normal drinker who m can put down one drink and be finished. There are those of us that cannot do this though. We drink into oblivion and this makes us feel good when doing the action of drinking. The next day our desire to quit comes for only a few moments and then the insanity of the spiritual malady kicks in and makes us take another drink to start the day out. This is a never ending cycle until one gets help from a detoxification system of some sort.
Too many people go to treatment centers, to stop drinking entirely. However, upon leaving a facility as a drug and alcohol treatment center the urge to drink comes about from being away from the confines of a facility. There is big money to be made by treatment centers and they are growing as this story is written. The thousands of dollars for a thirty day treatment center can range from the forty thousand dollar range all the way up to one hundred thousand dollar range. Insurance companies are paying only a small portion of this tab, because the relapse rate is high among first time recovering alcoholics. Why is this so?


Let’s look at the situation, you just were confined to this beautiful treatment center and every day you have meetings all day long, and are surrounded by people that you can relate to on a mental, and physical basis. The recovering alcoholic goes through many psychological changes in treatment centers. They are finding out who they really are, and some are afraid of leaving the confinement of this place. There is controlled non-drinking activities for the patient. People get use to this and realize once they have gone their usual thirty day treatment that they will face reality. There are several who have excellent insurance and will treatment hop. This is the action of going to one treatment center to another in a matter of months, because of the confinement they are relaxed and want to remain sober and this is the only way they can. A community of these people exists and go through thousands of dollars to remain in this active group of alcoholics. This in itself is a sickness, then the insurance money is gone, they are left with being homeless, if not staying sober and pushing a basket full of clothes around the neighborhood, as the old drunk who can’t stay sober. This is a reality in our world. Most human’s frown upon these few unfortunate people that are destined to die if life does not change for them. Can these “bums” change?


Yes, that is the good part, can you change him? No, there is no way a person can change anybody that is sick spiritually, and most will end up dead or in mental institutions. The worst case scenario is this person ends up in jail, and confined for life of prison. They can be lawyers, doctors and your everyday person that just cannot handle drinking. There is hope and that hope lies in the principles in AA. Yes, may of men and women have lost everything materialistic and even part of their pride? Their spiritual malady is dead and they are physically and internally sick. They can survive if given a hand of help, and driven to a place where hope still exists. AA in itself has helped people sober up in spare rooms set aside for those whom cannot afford treatment, and have the necessary tools to aid a victim of alcoholism and gain his pride back for twenty four hours, then a spiritual program outlined in the Big Book of AA can be shown to the newcomer and a new person can emerge as if a child is reborn. Many of us have been this direction and thank God for programs that cost no money, and offered by such agencies, like the Salvation Army and others. These agencies care about the alcoholic that has lost everything including their personal lives. One can become a new and active member in his community, if strong and willing to follow a few steps on a daily, or hourly basis. The spiritual malady can be re-shaped to accept this new way of living.


There is hope and even recovery if this person will dedicate his life to a higher power, or God as he understands him. You must have a spiritual revelation in your heart and head and want what AA has to offer. This is the only way to stay sober. Many of us have tried to drink only a few beers, or mix drinks where they are not as strong, and ended up flat on the street passed out again. We get up and try again, and again. Sometimes there is no hope for those who keep falling because they get involved in illegal activities and are helpless. There are many more of us that have been beaten up enough and give into the twelve steps of AA and live normal lives, as do our neighbors, and become respected, born again humans. We love, and are loved by our fellow friends and help others to quit drinking with our experiences, strength, and hopes.  
There is a re-birth of character through following the outline in AA and one can laugh for once in his or her life and lead an employed, enjoyable life, with the understanding that one drink will lead to another embedded into their head they will never forget where they are and where they came from. That is what AA is all about, fellowship and helping the alcoholic deal with living life on life’s terms. It’s a new way of living and you will be thrilled of how you are perceived from others who may have known you during the bad times and respect your new self as a person who has beat the disease of alcoholism. Though, do not fool yourself, you are one drink away from disaster. This has to be remembered and never forgotten or you will relapse and it could be your last one.


Working The Steps on Thurday

Working the twelve steps in AA can help with a multitude of addictions you may have. It could be alcoholic, eating disorders, gambling, and anything you have an addiction to. These steps have been successful in daily living for millions of people. Why do they work? The only answer I can come up with is that you let go and help others to obtain their destination, whether alcoholic, or a person with an addiction to eating too much or eating too little. You let God take over and let him rule your spirit. It sounds complicated, but if it were easy we would have more sober and less problems in life.

You must work with other alcoholics or you die. That's the truth, Alcohol will kill you eventually if you keep getting sober then slip often enough, this is a proven fact. The twelve steps of alcoholics anonymous was written with you in mind. To help you with daily living without a drink. It works if you work it. Take it easy on your self and make the best of it you can.

Did you know AA is online in chat. Yes, there are AA meetings online and that is wonderful for anyone. It cannot take advantage of the getting out of the house and meeting people though. This is a good way to begin and get your feet wet though with the program itself. You can attend these meetings all day long, and specific times are on these web sites that sponsor such programs.

Do yourself a favor today and attend an AA meeting and go away with something new from someone. It is a program of relief to most of us, and you will not have to suffer alone. God Bless....Christopher Hyer

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Wed and a New Beginning

This is a great day to start a new project. What can you do? Well , I will let you in on what I am doing. I write articles for several different magazines online. I am pretty sloppy on this blog site, yet when it comes to work I am as precise on my grammar as I can be. Spelling has to be exact, and word usage has to be perfect. We strive for perfection anyway, right. Well none of us are perfect , and I get rejected almost 50 percent of the time with my articles. If your starting out, I would suggest you study up on grammar and make an outline on the topic you will write about.
My Old C5 2004 Corvette, Dangerous...cpy@christopherhyer.com

When I write for this blog I do it my way, its a free for all for me. So my sentence structure and words just come from my brain onto this page without any order. Therefor the misconception of a good writer is at hand. I suggest also that you write for the best. Yahoo Voices is a great place to make good money, yet the Editors are strict. If you get an article on this site , you can make big money. I have made about 400.00 per article, so take your time in writing for them and have patience. They will pay off big only if you have the quality they are looking for. There is also a writing Academy with Yahoo Voices and this will help you get your artic
les published by this group. I have not even finished this Academy yet, and I have been lucky on a few articles.

Staying sober means you have to put action to your prayers. Faith without works is dead. You have to help other alcoholics every day to stay sober in this world. Go to an AA meeting at noon or at 8pm. They are universal in time usually in every city in the USA. My friends from Russia who visit this site, I am curious to your input please make a comment if able to.  Today is the beginning of a new day and make it count, help someone out if you can, alcoholic or not. Maybe a child needs help with life, help.God bless and keep your head up high to the sky, your special and God knows this. Christopher Hyer 06/19/2013

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Tuesday and Living It

Christopherhyer Art Oil 2013
Well my fellow friends, its Tuesday again and what a day. Went to AA at noon and I was smoked out. I smell like a big lit cigarette. The meeting was good, yet I won't be going back due to all the smoke in this place. I was told, hey man you must of been to a bar that was filled with smoke, so why does it matter.  Well it does, I have quit for four years and I hate the smell of it on me. I can handle some smoke, but shit I smell. I will change and take a shower soon. You see we just can't have things our way. I have been working for a company that paid me by the job. Well I was paid peanuts for the work I do. I had enough and quit that today. I will find something else. I am experienced in many facets so not that worried about it.

So as, you can tell, I have had a trying day and God the spirit that guides me, knows what all I have done today. I believe he is ok with my decisions. The work was getting to me, not being paid what I deserved. I thought I could hold on and get more certificates in training, however I still have a few on my own I have to get. I do so much to make money to live that I will not go broke.That is what is so col about being a writer and photographer, with IT experience. I collect art also and make films. No big deal to lose one th
ing that took up too much of my time. I do need benefits, my insurance is high.

Let's look at this , I lost my job and I went to AA I am still sober, I was flipped off twice this morning for doing the speed limit, and I can live with all this. See how AA works in my life and God. There is no worry , I know God has something in store for me and I am excited for it. It will not happen when I want it to, but I have a film that I want to make in Corpus Christi, Texas, that I never finished. I may be able to complete this in the next couple of months and market this and make enough for a couple of years. Who knows, really God is the only one that knows, and I am confident that something good will happen, it always do if you do something about it.

Have a blessed day and move on like I am , and you will be ok. God Bless.  

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Mid Noon On Wed 06/12/2013

Work has slowed for me today and I am piling up for Thursday to get some work accomplished in IT. I have had a good day , ecept that I met a girl in AA and she didn't call me yet. I was a bit bummed out cause she is really special to me. She is beautiful , smart, and funny. All wrapped up into one cool package. She is even my age. Go figure and she has not called me back from this morning. I know that there are people in AA that do not call, or feel like shit and just don't want to be bothered. I , on the other hand am consistent and if I say I will be there I am. She made me no promises, though, so I should shut up.
cpy@christopherhyer2008

In AA relationships can be gruesome, and overwhelming. Two people that meet in AA may not be that compatable with each other. You seee them every night at meetings and they know your inner most secrets as you speak in AA at closed and open meetings. You get to know their weakness and their strengths. For a relationship to work in AA , one must be careful not to step on another's face. We will see how this will go or not go. It is a miracle to find that one girl whom you know is right for you though. It has been 16 years since I have had a relationship and maybe I am acting too fast. I willl pray about it and see what happens. Pray , pray , pray and more prayer is what this program calls for in all instances it seems. I dont get tired of it, it comes naturally. So be it. I should of hit a 1200pm meeting today as I wonder what to do as I have no real work right now but some writing to do for cash. I guess I just answered my question, so have a good day and we will talk to you soon. God Bless.

Sobriety and Covid and Living Normal

I have had this blog for ober 8 years and made nothing off of this blog. I write to talk about daily things and living without alcohol and I...